Oh religious people: you can never be sure if they love religion or secretly despise it. Why else would they resort to calling our free-thought movement “a religion” if not to criticize it? Obviously they recognize the fact that by definition, a religion is a creepy organization intent on pushing through their wacky agenda. While I agree this is a definite aspect of all religion, conflating our lack of belief with their dogma is both insulting and totally untrue. If atheism is a religion, than bald is a hair style.

That hasn’t stopped Mitt Romney from trying to scare the bejesus out of his faithful base. He recently tried to argue that Obama is intent on establishing a “new secular religion” that would reject all doctrine:

“I think there is in this country a war on religion,” Romney replied. “I think there is a desire to establish a religion in America known as secularism…an attack on one religion is an attack on all religion.”

Framing it this way makes sense for Romney: he needs a bunch of denominations that have hated each other for centuries to band together and help him fight the evils of scientific materialism. What is hilarious to note is the government is already in the business of establishing religion, albeit unofficially. Tax exemption, government funded abstinence programs, and religious organizations receiving government monies for their programs amounts to the same thing. For us “secularists” to compete, we would need to receive millions of dollars in subsidies, never pay any taxes, and have government sponsored student assemblies “preaching” common sense and rationalism. As you can probably guess, it’ll be a cold day in Hell when we get this kind of assistance. Hey, we’re the underdogs in this fight, but it won’t stop these fuckos from trying to paint us as the bad guys.