You know, I’ve always believed people who claim to want to stop debauchery, sin and vice were secretly engaging in these same activities. It explains why they think whatever they are railing against is a bigger deal than it actually is.

One such hypocrite is Pastor Grant Storms, a man who’s been fighting against the “debauchery” of New Orleans for nearly a decade:

A self-styled “Christian patriot,” Storms led a small West Bank congregation called The Reformer Church and for 10 years hosted “The Reformer Radio Show” on WSHO. Storms has railed against the Roman Catholic church, calling it “satanic” and “demonic.”

His merry band of assholes have been disrupting the festival for years, shouting hateful obscenities and forcing the city to issue an ordinance against bullhorns at the event (takes only a few people to ruin something, doesn’t it?).

He might have a bit of a harder time attracting his group back after he was caught masturbating in a van near a kid’s park by two female witnesses. When the police showed up to arrest him, he claimed that he was in fact trying to urinate in a beer bottle. Nice defense, dude.