In a desperate attempt to appeal to more young people, the Vatican has announced that a young man by the name of Carlo Acutis, who died recently due to complications with Lukemia, will become a saint after a so-called miracle attributed to the youth.

The Vatican has been on a canonizing tear recently. Only a few years ago, 10 new saints were added. Some had been dead for a while. One such person, an Indian man who had converted to Christianity in 1745, was subsequently tortured and killed for trying to spread his faith. Another, born in the 1500’sm, was a party boy that eventually dedicated his life to spreading the church’s lies. He died in 1607.

It appears that these old stuffy saints were doing little to attract new converts. It’s why they must have thanked their lucky stars when Acutis began to make social media posts about the faith. Although his parents were not particularly religious, when the family immigrated to Italy, the young man began to take an immediate interest. As is pretty typical in these situations, the “miracle” is pretty mundane stuff:

On July 8, 2022, Liliana prayed at Blessed Carlo’s tomb in Assisi, leaving a letter describing her plea. Six days earlier, on July 2, her daughter Valeria had fallen from her bicycle in Florence, where she was attending university. She had suffered severe head trauma, and required craniotomy surgery and the removal of the right occipital bone to reduce pressure on her brain, with what her doctors said was a very low chance of survival. Liliana’s secretary began praying immediately to Blessed Carlo Acutis, and on July 8, Liliana made her pilgrimage to his tomb in Assisi. That same day, the hospital informed her that Valeria had begun to breath spontaneously. The next day, she began to move and partially regain her speech.

I mean, it seems like this is more of a testament to the young woman’s doctors. Let’s not forget that she was also in the prime of her life, so making a dramatic recovery was not an impossibility.

I have to wonder just how many people troll hospitals praying to random dead people for a miracle. If the prayer fails, do they get deducted a point? Seems as though they are only interested in the hits rather than the misses. They also never seem to lose any points when people pray to saints and fail to make a recovery. If people were keeping score, it would be a different matter I’m sure. Still, what else do you expect from a cult that dresses up in weird outfits and claims to speak to their imaginary friend?