I think fingerprinting people is kind of paranoid and ridiculous, but I never thought anyone would be against it on religious grounds. Guess I’m an idiot. Pam McLaurin is an evangelical Christian who takes her Book of Revelation pretty fucking seriously. She thinks by having her fingerprints in a database, she’ll be cursed and marked for eternal damnation. She filed a lawsuit against Texas Education Agency (who will fire her if she doesn’t comply with their policy), citing religious discrimination. Check out one of the passages she put in the brief:

He causes all, both small and great, rich and poor, free and slave, to receive a mark on their right hand and on their foreheads, and that no one may buy or sell except one who has the mark or the name of the beast, or the number of his name.… Then a third angel followed them saying with a loud voice — if anyone worships the beast and his image and receives his mark on his forehead or on his hand he himself shall also drink of the wine of the wrath of God.… He shall be tormented with fire and brimstone in the presence of the holy angels and in the presence of the Lamb.

It’s some pretty scary shit when you think about it. Has no one really considered the possibility St. John was totally batshit crazy when he wrote it? Actually, Thomas Jefferson sure thought so, as did Martin Luther. I have to shake my head in disbelief that some people can take the insane rantings of a lunatic seriously (and when I say some, I mean millions of people). Fuck, I need to go grab a drink (or twelve).