Desperate Haitians need e-meters, stat!

I complain about Christian charity organizations all the time, but since most of the population in Haiti actually believes in the same religion (with a few added voodoo rituals), I’m not really worried about their incessant need to proselytize. What I AM concerned about, however, is John Travolta and his merry band of Scientologists making a surprise flight to the devastated country. I guess Haiti is in desperate need of e-meters or something, and the yellow shirted weirdos will be going around giving vitamins and “touch assists” to people in need.

Why don’t you stay out of everyone’s way John? The last thing they need is another religious organization trying to peddle their ridiculous beliefs; they need water, food, and most importantly, money. Instead of spending all that dough to send your thetan peddling zombies to the country, why don’t you write the Red Cross a big fat check and stay the fuck out of Dodge. Of course, I’m forgetting the possibility that perhaps his plane might crash into the Ocean on the way there…a man can dream, can’t he?