Author Archives: Jacob Fortin

Marco Rubio doesn’t know how dumb he is

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f you weren’t already sick of the race to the White House, you’re going to hate the next 4 years of your life, as the media can’t help but trip over themselves trying to predict the possible candidates for 2016. One prospect for Republicans is a Hispanic Florida Senator by the name of Marco Rubio. He’s made the new recently for saying some profoundly dumb shit:

I’m not a scientist, man. I can tell you what recorded history says, I can tell you what the Bible says, but I think that’s a dispute amongst theologians and I think it has nothing to do with the gross domestic product or economic growth of the United States. I think the age of the universe has zero to do with how our economy is going to grow. I’m not a scientist. I don’t think I’m qualified to answer a question like that. At the end of the day, I think there are multiple theories out there on how the universe was created and I think this is a country where people should have the opportunity to teach them all. I think parents should be able to teach their kids what their faith says, what science says. Whether the Earth was created in 7 days, or 7 actual eras, I’m not sure we’ll ever be able to answer that. It’s one of the great mysteries.

It’s a great mystery how in the age of science someone could still be so profoundly ignorant about the age of the Earth. Maybe a few decades ago, before everyone had the Library of Alexandria in their fucking pocket, it would have been understandable not to know. Hell, we’ve only really known about the age of the universe for a few generations, and it can take time for something to really be known. But by now, not knowing is really an active choice one has to make. That ignorance must be embraced, since I doubt Rubio has never been confronted with the factual age of the Cosmos at some point in his life.

Sure, there are multiple ‘theories’ of how old the earth is, but only one of them is actually a scientific theory and not the dumb invention of ignorant sheep herders (keep in mind both definitions are entirely different as well). As for whether or not economies depend on knowing the age of the Earth, I would argue that a man who sits on the Senate Commerce, Science, and Transportation Committee should know by now you can’t actually have an economy without science, or its baby sister, technology. Knowing how old the Earth is should be a requirement if you’re on a committee with the fucking word ‘science’ in it, don’t you think?

Either two things are at play here: either Rubio is trying to a appeal to his science hating base, or he’s a fucking moron. And while all of this science denial is a part of the modern electoral strategy one has to employ, I wouldn’t be surprised if Rubio didn’t actually believe the evidence that the Earth is over 4.5 billion years old. That’s because this concept alone is terrifying to the provincialism of religious myths. How insignificant are humans if we represent but a blip in the history of Earth and the Cosmos, and what does it say about their unimpressive dead Jew?

Irish PM doesn’t want to feel rushed into changing abortion law

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Since I first blogged about this a few days ago, the death of Savita Halappanavar has caused a lot of understandable outrage in Ireland. It seems her highly avoidable passing has rudely awakened a generation of young people who are shocked their own health could be threatened due to the persistence of religious dogma.

Even more shocking, they’re about to realize change is impossibly slow, given the ones holding the reins of power have no interest in making necessary change, lest it upset the old guard:

“This is a matter that has divided Irish society now for a great number of years, and I am not going to be rushed into a situation by force of numbers on any side,” Prime Minister Enda Kenny told state broadcaster RTE.

I don’t give a damn if you feel abortion is wrong. That’s your own personal opinion, and as uninformed as it is, it doesn’t for one second change the fact they need to happen. Making them illegal or inaccessible places the lives of actual sentient beings at risk, whether it be from botched street abortions, or from countless medical complications caused by pregnancies. I don’t have to bring up the fact women were dying all the time before abortion was legal in America, do I?

Like drug prohibitionism, making something illegal doesn’t actually solve anything: it in fact compounds both the risk and the cost to society by making them the realm of black markets and underground economies. These are the real consequences of a confused sense of moral responsibility towards unborn fetuses (which tragically seems to end once they’ve taken their very first breath of air), and should not be ignored. Unlike our religious counterparts, it’s the material world we are concerned with, and the individuals who make up that physical realm. The supposed concerns of a make believe troll or bearded entity in the sky has absolutely no bearing on the procedures we undertake to save the lives of other human beings.

If there is any debate, it boils down to this: medical decisions should be pretty obvious considering one is based on simple logic, the other is based on the interpretation of a fairy tale about a guy pulling out on her brother’s widow, and getting killed by a vengeful deity.

It’s divided society alright: one side thinks people should have the ability to be treated for a medical condition based on science, and not religion. The fact some people are mad that abortions happen is irrelevant to their actual real need. And the victims of all this stupidity are women. Now, I wonder how a society still under the spell of a misogynistic, male dominated cult will react to the news there’s no real rush to ensure their well being is preserved so the feelings of superstitious ignoramuses can be spared?

“This is something that has to be dealt with rationally, and openly and truthfully and that is what will happen,” said Kenny.

Dealt with rationally? Do you honestly think the reason for these insane restrictions are logical and reasonable to begin with?

FFRF sues IRS for failing to enforce tax-exempt rules

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Now that the election is over and President Obama no longer has to be afraid of Evangelicals bent on his destruction, it’s time to put aside petty politics and enforce the law in regards to religious institutions and their supposed neutrality when it comes to politics.

We all know countless religious organizations have been violating the rules of their tax-exempt status, which stipulates pastors are not allowed to specifically endorse a political candidate. The logic behind this rule is simple: religions hold a lot of sway and power, and the last thing you want is for that power to be used to dictate who their followers should vote for. It makes an implicit statement about the role of church in politics: kindly stay the fuck out of it, or we’ll take away your privileges.

Unfortunately, the IRS has gone out of its way to ignore any attempts to challenge it, even when over 1500 pastors openly defied them in the hopes they could then turn around and take this issue to the courts (and ultimately end up costing everyone a lot of money to determine they don’t have a legal leg to stand on). If you thought there might be some kind of reasonable explanation from the IRS as to why they’ve so consistently failed to uphold the law, you’ll be shocked by how much they are tripping over one another trying to get their bullshit story straight:

“We are holding any potential church audits in abeyance,” IRS official Russell Renwicks said.

The IRS later disavowed the statement, insisting the agency intended to investigate the many complaints it had received once it revised its regulations.

“The IRS continues to run a balanced program that follows up on potential non-compliance, while ensuring the appropriate oversight and review to determine that compliance activities are necessary and appropriate,” IRS spokesman Dean Patterson clarified.

Talk about backtracking; in the past three years, there hasn’t been one single investigation, despite the fact thousands of pastors continually violated this law like it was Jodie Foster in The Accused.

Dissatisfied by the lack of balls in the organization, the Freedom From Religion Foundation is suing the IRS for its failure to comply with their own law. If you think this is a worthy cause and want to support them (hint: I think we all should), then go to their site and make a donation. Let’s hit these religious fuckers where it hurts the most: the pocketbook!

Religious whacko stabs husband because Jesus told her to

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A few days ago, I debated two religious dudes on a show called “Faith and Skepticism” (they might as well call the show oil and water considering how incompatible those two things are), and the one thing they couldn’t seem to grasp is the idea that “hearing the voice of God” is usually a sign of insanity. Obviously, the degree of this insanity can be measured by analyzing what is being communicated. If the little voice inside your head is telling you that you’re a good person and need to donate more money to whatever religious institution you’re part of, we would rank this as fairly low on the nut-job scale (though medical treatment should still be sought). If the voice tells you to stab your husband because Jesus and Mary told you he’s Satan spawn, you’ve probably reached the point where serious medication is your only “salvation”

A woman who allegedly stabbed her husband said she did it after, “Jesus and Mary told me to kill him because he is Satan’s spawn!” according to a police report… Horry County Police deputies were called to [Tammy] Estep’s residence at approximately 6:45 a.m. on the day of the incident. When they arrived, Estep told officers that “She was sent to save the world,” according to a police report.

What better way to save the world than by stabbing your partner repeatedly? My question is how long had she been over the deep end, and were there any other signs people ignored up until that point, convinced that her scary nonsense was just religious fervor. It’s kind of hard to tell sometimes, isn’t it? Yeah, that’s not a coincidence…

Cindy Jacobs thinks wishful thinking stops terrorists

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Thank the dead Palestinian Jew who probably never even existed that Cindy Jacobs and her group of whackjobs were around in 2011 to protect us with her ‘prayer cover’ that’s been actively thwarting terrorist’s attempts. Also in more personal news, I have a rock that can protect you from being mauled by a tiger. I’m currently selling it for the low-low price of $999.99, so you better move if you want my useless piece of shit talisman to protect your loved ones from dangerous man-eating tigers! How do I know it works? Well, I’ve never once suffered a tiger attack, so it’s obviously doing something right! Who knows how many tiger attacks it’s prevented over the years?

Pedophile priest blames God for making him this way

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I’ve heard a lot of tortured explanations from the Catholic Church over the years as to why so many priests are sexually abusing children. Pope Benedict XVI claimed it was increased secularization that somehow made their theists behave so immorally. Homosexuality has also been blamed, despite the fact that as many female children are abused as males. Finally, though, one pedophile priest by the name of David Edwin Rapson in Australia has finally used a novel defense I think makes a bit more sense: He blamed God for making him that way:

A former Catholic priest accused of molesting boys at a Victorian school said, “God made us this way and it’s his fault” when a fellow priest urged him to resist

When he was finally confronted by a fellow priest, he responded to his accuser with “You’re one to talk. You’re the same as me….You know what we do here”, prompting me to think this must be yet another way these bastards get away with abuse for so long. Who’s going to report them? Their fellow molesters? Yeah, that fucking seems likely.

Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard has recently OK’d a royal commission to look into the abuse after a police detective named Peter Fox wrote a letter to his premier begging him to open up an investigation. Fox felt both the police department and the Church had actively sabotaged any investigation into the matter, and an independent body needed to look into the matter. Surprisingly, it didn’t take long for the government to spring into action (yeah, I know how weird it is to even write that down). Now we only need to sit back and watch the horror unfold before our eyes. I hope you have a strong stomach, Aussies, because you’re about to be put to the test in the coming months.

Doctors refused abortion because “it’s a Catholic country”

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Ireland may be quickly de-converting to atheism faster than any other country, but that certainly doesn’t mean the fight against superstition and religious indoctrination is over. If anything, the stakes have gotten higher, especially when it comes to certain key issues which don’t seem to go away. A young woman by the name of Savita Halappanavar was told she was miscarrying, and after one day in severe pain, asked for a medical termination. This was refused, her husband says, because the fetal heartbeat was still present and they were told, “this is a Catholic country”.

She spent a further 2½ days “in agony” until the fetal heartbeat stopped.

By the time the fetus’ heart had finally stopped, many of Savita’s organs had already begun to shut down. When they began operating on her, it was already too late, and she died.

the hospital extended its sympathy to the family and friends of Ms. Halappanavar but could not discuss the details of any individual case.

Somehow, a “sorry your wife died because our bullshit doctors think life begins at conception” doesn’t cut it. How about a “we’ll make sure no other woman has to die needlessly because we still think we’re living in the 18th century”. Ireland, I think it’s time for you to clean house and prove why you’re in the Top 10 atheist countries. Do it for the future Savitas’ of the world.

Christoga is as annoying as it sounds

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I have some fond memories of the TV show Northern Exposure. It might have something to do with the fact Alaska looks a lot like rural Quebec in the winter (complete with wood shacks, small town politics, and some adorable wackos). Janine Turner was in my spank bank for several years after the show had ended, but then again, I didn’t have the Internet to tell me what a bat-shit crazy bitch she is. When she isn’t supporting Sarah Palin as a political candidate, she’s helping teach people the secrets of ‘Christoga’, an exercise routine for aging Christian hags who want to spend as much time working out as the do praying to their invisible friend.

Is it a complete bastardization of another faith’s exercise routine? Sure, but to be fair, yoga had been watered down by white people for decades, so we’ll assume this is just yet another example of the pathetic cash-grab Christians are so famous for. “Watch us do ineffectual movements while vaguely mentioning Jesus.” Fun times…

Shocking: Atheist kids dare to express themselves

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If you’ve never heard of The Blaze (like probably 99% of the population), it’s a creation of Glenn Beck and his conservative production company, Mercury Radio Arts (the irony of naming your production company after a metal that makes one insane is probably lost on these people). If the site isn’t regularly scaring people into buying gold, it feeds them pseudo information that plays into people’s fears and prejudices. Their latest fear mongering article is about the American Humanist Association’s new website, KidswithoutGod.com, which they think aims at “converting kids over to the secular religion of atheism“

The atheist activist community in America has taken an increasingly-active role in trying to convince citizens with doubts about their faith to fully evolve into non-believers and to “come out,” publicly proclaiming their anti-theism. Think of it as a form of secular evangelism. Already, non-believers have attempted to reach clergy who are in doubt through The Clergy Project. Additionally, there’s a humanist church service each week in Tulsa, Oklahoma (and these are only two examples). Now, in addition to reaching adults, atheist activists have their eyes set on converting kids and teens.

The website, which dares to encourage kids to be nice to other people, eat well, tell the truth, take responsibility for one’s actions, to take care of the environment, and to think for themselves, probably seems to ignorant theists as some kind of effort to ‘indoctrinate’ kids (funny how they don’t seem to mind at all when it’s their shit they are trying to inculcate). In reality, it’s merely a place for kids who weren’t brainwashed at an early age to realize they aren’t the only disbelievers out there. One article is even entitled “No Name Calling” when referring to believers. You can’t get more milk-toast than that, folks.

Their over-reaction is kind of hilarious, don’t you think?

Italians want to finally tax the Catholic Church

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With all the belt tightening happening in Italy, the general population is putting into motion a plan to tax the Catholic Church’s many holdings and tax exempt businesses. The total amount of revenue this would generate for the country is estimated to be about a billion dollars annually.

Following their government’s latest austerity measure package, more than 130,000 people signed an online petition calling for the Church’s tax exempt status to be revoked. Since 2005, church-run groups and organizations have not been classed as official commercial bodies and have been exempt from paying property tax.

Now, before you go jumping for joy, keep in mind Italy would only be taxing property that doesn’t have a specific religious intent. Tax authorities will need to scrutinize all of the Church’s holdings to determine which category they fit in.

So, it’s still pretty weak-sauce, but it’s a step in the right direction. Here’s hoping Italy’s austerity measures (another nice way of saying “fuck the poor”) continue to drive the idea that the Church has been getting a free ride for way too long. Enjoy your privilege while you can, Vatican. Eventually, they’ll be coming for your gold plates and jewel encrusted cutlery.

All Uganda wants for Christmas is to kill the gays

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It was only a matter of time before Uganda – oblivious to international pressure – would pass their notorious ‘kill the gays’ bill. Claiming homosexuals pose a ‘serious threat’, the government has decided to pass the law by the end of December. The speaker of the Cabinet, Rebecca Kadaga (seen above waving a fucking Bible, what else?), said this would be a Christmas present for her constituents. This barbaric bill is divided into two parts:

‘Aggravated homosexuality’ is defined as gay acts committed by parents or authority figures, HIV-positive people, pedophiles and repeat offenders. If convicted, they will face the death penalty.

The ‘offense of homosexuality’ includes same-sex sexual acts or being in a gay relationship, and will be prosecuted by life imprisonment.

So, it’s either the death penalty or life imprisonment, depending on just how ignorant the prosecution is. Kadaga even suggested that the whole of Africa, a continent in the grips of religious revival, should pass similar laws to needlessly torture, imprison, and murder individuals whose only crime is to have same sex attractions.

American Evangelicals must be jumping for joy at the thought of all the anti-gay shit they keep spewing is being taken seriously by some people.

The Catholic church really is full of pedophiles

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It’s difficult to actually assess just how corrupt the Catholic Church is, but judging by the testimony of Father Kevin Lee, the accusation often lobbied at the church – mainly that it provides an attractive employment opportunity for sexual abusers – seems legitimate. Lee, who was fired for marrying a woman (the nerve!), had been documenting allegations of abuse for years, and found himself frustrated by the inaction of both church officials and police. Even the press wouldn’t touch it with a ten foot pole.

In the course of my life as a priest I became aware that some of the other priests were actually pedophiles, and not necessarily becoming priests because they wanted to help people. They were pedophiles that were looking for opportunity… I saw a system of cover-up, a system of blind-eye turning and just ignorance of the fact is was happening.

You don’t need to be a cynic to understand the reasons for this. Since the very inception of the church – a creepy old boys club breathlessly anticipating the destruction of the world in a sea of blood – there’s been something fundamentally wrong with this organization. As early as 60 AD, reports of child abuse could already be found in a document entitled The Didache, which stipulates quite plainly that the priestly class is not to seduce young boys (guess it was a real problem after just a few years doing their shtick).

Even in the 11th century, when a priest wrote the Book of Gomorrah (a book largely condemning homosexuality), the author complained of a systematic cover-up of the rape of young boys. Evidently, this institution has a long and practiced history when it comes to providing shelter and attractive opportunities to offend (and get moved around for a fresh batch of innocents). If you wanted to offend and avoid going to jail, what career would you chose? How many other organizations provide this level of comfort and protection to people who sexually abuse children?

Help strip politically bent religious institutions of tax exempt status

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Remember a few weeks back when over 1000 preachers openly defied the IRS and began politically endorsing Mitt Romney? Well, it certainly wasn’t the first time these guys broke the law, and it certainly won’t be the last. This stunt was in an effort to repeal a law that until now, the IRS has refused to enforce. Gutsy, this was not.

“Pulpit Freedom Sunday” has been staged annually since 2008 by a group called the Alliance Defending Freedom. Its aim is to provoke a challenge from the U.S. Internal Revenue Service in order to file a lawsuit and have its argument out in court.

In response to this outrageous affront to a simple rule allowing them not to pay taxes (effectively making us all sponsors of their nonsense), there’s an online petition aiming to put pressure on the Obama Administration to actually enforce this tax code on offending religious institutions.

In recent years, the IRS has turned a blind eye to offending Religious institutions that mix religion with politics. By not enforcing the qualifications & disqualification’s of 26 U.S.C. § 501(c) of the United States tax code, the IRS is doing a diservice [sic] to both the American people & the vision of our forefathers.

I know most of you think petitions aren’t worth the paper they are printed on (especially ones with a typo in a three paragraph pitch), but keep in mind that with the election over, Obama no longer needs to tip toe around Evangelicals anymore. And if he wants a Democratic congress in 2014, the best way to ensure that is to stop preachers from using their immense power to essentially control the vote of their congregation (who almost always vote conservative).

They still need about 21,000 signatures, so if you’re as ass pissed off as I am that religious douche-bags keep abusing their tax exempt status, why don’t you take 3 minutes out of your day and sign the damn thing?

Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?

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You could easily replace the word ‘segregation’ with ‘marriage equality’, and echo the same argument modern bigots are using to try and justify their homophobia. They talk of freedom from tyranny, ignoring completely the fact that it is their hatred and intolerance which creates the inequity that so characterizes tyrannies.

The good news is the man in this video, George Wallace Jr., would eventually change his mind after an assassination attempt and being born again. He would even make history by appointing two African Americans in his cabinet (which in Alabama has yet to be surpassed even today). So, even the most ardent bigots can sometimes change their minds. Sort of gives you hope, right?

New South Wales Premier OKs inquiry into clergy abuse

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Tell me if this doesn’t sound like a kick ass movie: a police detective -convinced the police force has been helping clergy cover up sexual abuse- sends a letter to the premier urging him to open an investigation into the whole affair. If it wasn’t actually happening in New South Wales, I’d think maybe it was a cheesy John Grisham novel.

Detective Chief Inspector Peter Fox (sounds like a movie name, right?) sent a letter to Premier Barry O’Farrell challenging him to open a royal commission to look into multiple abuse cover-ups by the Catholic Church, along with the co-operation of certain corrupt police officers. It appears this Australian Serpico has been investigating these abuses for over a decade, and found so many cases of abuse that he’s lost count.

“I can testify from my own experience that the church covers up, silences victims, hinders police investigations, alerts offenders, destroys evidence and moves priests to protect the good name of the church,” he wrote in his letter.

As you can imagine, his failure to follow the proper chain of command has angered a lot of people in his department, and his police department is throwing him under the bus (claiming the church has been co-operative, like we fucking believe that for one second). Still, it seems as though he’s managed to create enough of a stir that the premier has agreed to the idea. Now we simply have to wait and see all the horrible stories emerge. Just one more reason for Aussies to abandon this poison called religion.