Michigan Satanists Outrage Christians with Invocation

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. This is the lesson that Ottawa, Mich. Christians are beginning to learn. You see, a few months back, the Board of Commissioners was sued by an LGBT group for only allowing Christian prayers before the beginning of meetings. Because of that pesky First Amendment of their own Constitution, the Board was forced to allow other faiths the opportunity to spread their own religion. Enter the Satanic Temple, always there to freak out Christians.

A member call Luis Cypher (I mean, that’s just clever), began his evocation thusly:

“That must be destroyed by truth, should never be spared. It’s demise. It is done. Hail Satan. Thank you very much, we wish everyone a wonderful evening tonight.”

This of course outraged Christians, who still think that followers of the Church of Satan are somehow worshipping the devil. So naturally, they fail to understand that all of this is a reaction to their own unconstitutional practices.

“Tonight you all had failed miserably in your primary responsibility. You have out of the respect for a flawed custom of men allowed worship not only to a false ideal of man’s creation but to the greatest enemy of the all good God who allowed you to fill these positions,” one resident said at the podium while holding a cross.

Obviously that guy watched too many horror movies, thinking that his little torture device does anything at all. It’s the equivalent of clutching your pearls. Honestly, I am always grateful and delighted by the Satanic Church. Who else out there is shoving Christian hypocrisy in their faces like they do? Keep on truckin’, you hedonistic beautiful bastards!

Florida Book Ban Now Includes Bible

Christians love to ban things. For them, the idea that people should be allowed to make up their own minds is ludicrous. Their god is in charge, and he hates fun things like sex, music, and people who aren’t constantly going on about how amazing he is. This is why they are always trying to make sure that you are as miserable as they are.

In Florida, governor Ron DeSantis has been trying to score points with his religious base for a while. He’s desperate to have the same popularity among evangelicals that his political rival, the giant Orange Turd, benefits from. In a desperate attempt to “be cool”, he’s introduced laws that allow parents to ban books they deem offensive. Since Florida is full of crazies, the broad language of the law does little to clarify what kinds of materials are deemed inappropriate.

Luckily, the Bible is one of the most offensive books ever written. It contains countless examples of rape, genocide, baby killing, human sacrifice, and extreme sexual content that would make any other novel pale in comparison. So much so, in fact that when local agitator and all around amazing named Chaz Stevens started to try and ban the Bible, and even the Thesaurus to point out the absurdity and vagueness of the book banning law, DeSantis declared that the problem was not with his law but with people who abuse the system:

“The idea that someone can use the parents rights and the curriculum transparency to start objecting to every single book to try to make a mockery of this is just wrong,” DeSantis said the day before the bill signing. “That’s performative. That’s political.”

The irony of a career politician accusing someone else of engaging in performative politics is incredible. Sure, Stevens would be the first to admit that he’s a provocateur’s, but his point is to show just how useless and performative DeSantis’ own laws are. So far, he’s doing a bang up job, and it’s driving his governor crazy. He’s a wild idea: why doesn’t Florida just accept that people should be allowed to make their own minds and not try to use the power of the state to impose your own beliefs? It’s something called “freedom”. You should try it!

 

Iowa Governor Signs New Law Targeting LGBT Groups

Christians have a warped sense of justice. In their eyes, if their favorite religion doesn’t have unilateral control over society, then it means they are being oppressed. It reminds me of a bully that cries fowl the moment someone dares to stand up to them. No content with trying to ram their faith down everyone’s throat, they are now trying to use the legal system to attack groups they dislike.

In Iowa, their governor by the name of Kim Reynolds has signed a new bill in secret during a meeting with a conservative Christian organization, despite the fact that business leaders have vehemently opposed it, afraid that it could spell disaster for the private sector.

A person, corporation, church, foundation or other entity whose exercise of religion has been burdened can go to court to seek damages or other means of redressing the harm against them.

How is a corporation “exercising” their religion? Clearly, this is being done in order for religious groups, upset that they have to treat others with dignity and respect, to be able to sue these groups for money. Many businesses in Iowa will now need to tiptoe around these religious fanatics, lest they be taken to court for offending them.

This kind of unconstitutional law is just another example of religion encroaching on public policy. The first amendment can apparently suck it: so long as people continue to elect these fundamentalist morons, they will continue to create chaos. What person in their right mind would purposefully choose to live there now?

To all my Satanist friends out there, I think it’s time to put this law into effect. Have you been discriminated against because of your love of Baal? I can only imagine the outrage on Christian faces when other faiths start using these laws to sue companies like Hobby Lobby, or Chick-fil-a for discrimination. You know why it’s better for a country to have “no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof”? It’s in order for every belief to have an equal footing.

If these guys want to fight dirty, I say we oblige them.

Arizona Lawmaker wants 10 Commandments in Classrooms

It will never stop. Religious morons will always insist that their sectarian messaging has to be in everyone’s faces, in every institution. It isn’t enough that they added their God in the pledge of allegiance, or display it on their currency. If their Christian God isn’t being constantly worshipped, then in their tiny minds, it means that their country is falling apart.

In Arizona, yet another lawmaker is attempting to bring the 10 Commandments into classrooms across the state. Sen Anthony Kern is not a particularly educated man. He has a bachelor in business administration, from one of the lowest ranked university in the country. When he was fired from his job as a certified peace officer for being a liar, he was put on the “Bradey List”, which is a record of misconduct and dishonesty for former officers.

Not content with doing a bad job in the public sector, he doubled down by becoming elected in Arizona’s senate. He’s tried to pass a series of stupid laws, including trying to make it a misdemeanor to travel as a passenger in a car without an ID. Sounds like some Nazi Germany shit.

While on the subject of fascism, Kern has recently tried to pass a bill that would force the 10 commandments to be displayed in schools, and for teachers to be compelled to include it in their curriculum. In his tiny mind, he believes that Christianity is the only reason that religious liberty exists in the first place:

And because America is such a diverse nation, it is because of the Christian religion that we have allowed their religions to come in and be known,’’ Kern said. “Because of the Christian religion and its foundation in this nation is the reason why we have other religions in this nation.’’

As you may recall, the people who left Europe to settle into what is now America had done so precisely because the ruling faith of their respective countries would not allow other forms of Christianity from existing. These were called “The European Wars of Religion”, and the whole affair lasted a few hundred years and cost millions of lives. Kern doesn’t know this because the only book he’s ever read is the Bible.

The thing about these kinds of idiot laws is that they are always shot down at some point by the fact that the highest law of the land, The Constitution, makes it very clear that government cannot be in the business of promoting any religion. It’s the fucking first sentence of the thing, and still American lawmakers act like it’s just a minor inconvenience.

So far, the only thing this waste of a human is capable of doing is spreading false information, and turning his country ever so slowly towards a fascist hellhole. Don’t you just love religion?

Americans Think Religion is Losing Influence

They say that a cornered animal is at its most dangerous. When desperation sets in, and the stakes are raised to the point of a fight for existence, then there is no telling what a creature can do to ensure its own survival. One thing is for certain: extreme caution is advised.

I say this, not to be hyperbolic (though I am already guilty of this), but as a warning to those of us that have become complacent, and convinced that religion is on it’s dying breath. It’s true that the steady decline of faith overall has been progressing well among the population. It’s been so rapid that a recent Pew poll found that 81% of Americans think that religion is losing influence in public life.

It’s important to note here that a full 69% of those respondents considered that a BAD thing, and believe that religion should have more influence. What they don’t realize is that influence has actually increased in public life. For instance, thanks to gerrymandering efforts in many states, courts are now packed with religiously minded judges. The same is true for school boards, where Dominionists have been busy sneaking religious education back into schools. This is only going to get worse.

72% of religiously unaffiliated adults – those who identify, religiously, as atheist, agnostic or “nothing in particular” – say conservative Christians have gone too far in trying to control religion in the government and public schools; 63% of Christians say the same about secular liberals.

The people I want to address in this study are the 47% of non religious liberals adults who don’t think that religious conservatives have gone too far. What the hell are you smoking? Did the recent events in Alabama not convince you that this is only the beginning? I wonder what other kinds of religious encroachment it’ll take for nearly HALF of the non-religious community being totally fine with that Christian nationalists are doing to their country.

This is how you lose: by keeping your head in the sand while your opponents, convinced that your side has gone too far, is busy taking away every progressive thing your ancestors fought tooth and nail for. I know it’s cliché to say this now, but we are officially the worst generation now: a bunch of feckless idiots that gave up at the finish line and let the world slip into a theocratic nightmare. Enjoy your distopia, morons.

The Good Atheist Podcast: EP 352

This episode, we discuss a variety of topics, from American religious nationalists to Hindu ones. We also talk about an attempted honor killing in Australia, and that governments softball response. Be sure to stay informed!

The Good Atheist
The Good Atheist Podcast: EP 352
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Christian Nationalists Now 1/3 of American Voters

If you want to be terrified, than look no further than this report by the Public Religion Research Institute, also known as PRRI, that demonstrates that roughly 1/3 of American voters identify or support the agenda of Christian Nationalists.

The findings of just who these people are should surprise no one. They are populated by a significant portion of old, white, evangelical Christians, although there seems to also be quite a few black and hispanic religious groups in the mix as well. In total, when you add up people who identify as Christian Nationalists, or who have sympathy for their cause, it amounts to over 30% of the voting population.

The reason that this should terrify people is that this number is an almost perfect parallel to what occurred in Weimar Germany before it was taken over by the Nazi party:

[T]he July 1932 elections brought the Nazi party 37.3 percent of the popular vote, making it the largest political party in Germany… In the ensuing elections in November 1932, the Nazis lost ground, winning 33.1 percent of the vote. The Communists, however gained votes, winning 16.9 percent. As a result, the small circle around President Hindenburg came to believe, by the end of 1932, that the Nazi party was Germany’s only hope to forestall political chaos ending in a Communist takeover.

The fragile democracy of Germany was broken by the time the Nazi party had a significant share of government power. It didn’t take a majority for them to simply take over. All they needed to do was ensure that everyone was more scared of their opponents, and when the moment was right, they literally executed their rivals, and declared themselves the only power. The destruction of Germany, and the deaths of hundreds of millions of people, was the result.

Now, the only main difference between 1930’s Germany and America in 2024, is that the economy has not (yet) collapse, or have a crisis. If it did, no doubt the number of people identifying as this frightening new minority would surely grow. The growing instability around the globe, and the renewed conflict of old enemies can be a catalyst for these religious psychos to try and grab more power.

The only solution to this disaster is for the “None”, the religiously unaffiliated, to take the mantel of power, and to act like a cohesive political group. Instead of just sitting by the sidelines and watching their country dissolve into a theocracy, the Nones will need to create political alliances with other groups that are fearful of this new development.

The alternative is to allow the most powerful military in the world to be controlled by people who pray every night for their God to destroy the world so that only their little pathetic religion can dominate.

 

Alabama Supreme Court is now the American Taliban

If you haven’t heard of the name Tom Parker, odds are you soon will. The Chief Justice is making news after declaring that embryos are children, in a landmark case that is bound to send shockwaves through the state, if not the country.

It all began with a lawsuit. A couple that was using Invitro fertilization wanted to sue the clinic in Alabama for accidentally destroying a few of their frozen embryos. The Center for Reproductive Medicine, located in Mobile, Alabama, had an accident during the transfer of the embryos, and they were lost as a result. The couple, rather than move on with their lives, decided that they wanted to sue them for wrongful death. The case went all the way to the state Supreme Court, which ruled an overwhelming majority of 8-1 that these embryos were indeed children. The court, which sounds more like a branch of the Vatican, quoted the Bible multiple times, and the name “God” is invoked over a dozen times.

“Human life cannot be wrongfully destroyed without incurring the wrath of a holy God,” he wrote in a concurring opinion that invoked the Book of Genesis and the prophet Jeremiah and quoted at length from the writings of 16th- and 17th-century theologians.

“Even before birth,” he added, “all human beings have the image of God, and their lives cannot be destroyed without effacing his glory.”

Parker further claims that all governments are created by God, this despite the fact that the Constitution he swore to uphold makes it abundantly clear that government is to stay out of the business of mandating religion. He doesn’t see it this way. He’s part of a clandestine Christian movement called “The Seven Mountains”, which aims to inject their religious tyranny in all aspects of government. This plan has been in motion for decades, and because everyone around them was asleep at the wheel, they’ve effectively turned the state into their version of a theocracy, complete with religiously mandated laws.

As a consequence of this decision, fertility clinics across the state have suspended all services. This means that couples wishing to have assistance in having children are incapable of doing so until this insane mess is sorted. Considering how stacked with Christian nationalists the courts are, it’s doubtful that this will be repealed. Even Republican lawmakers seem confused about the decision. They claim to be “pro families”, but had no idea that declaring a frozen clump of cells a “human child” would have terrifying consequences for IFV clinics. Since the Supreme Court decision was literally made to allow a couple to sue over a few of their embryos being destroyed, this means that it’s doubtful that any medical organization would even dare operate in a state where they are always one mistake away from financial oblivion. This has spelled disaster for thousands of Alabamans struggling with fertility.

Again and again voters were sold a pack of lies, courtesy of religiously minded politicians that place their faith above their duty to their fellow countrymen. Many of them entered politics not with a desire to help, but with the ambition of turning their country into an unrecognizable religiously repressive place, where freedom is a thing of the past, and subjugation to their imaginary friends and his conflicting rulebook. It is time to weed out these religion elements and expose them for what they are: the American Taliban.

Christian Nationalist Think-Tank Ready to Pounce

If you’re an American, hopefully you’ve come to the realization that your country is in serious trouble. The rise of Christian Nationalism went from a growing concern to an outright menace to free society.

If you think I’m being hyperbolic, than it means you haven’t read this: the manifesto for The Center for Renewing America, a think-tank (I use the word loosely here) lead by a man named Russell Vought. Vought had previously worked as Trump’s director of Office of Management and Budget when he was president, and he’s preparing himself and others for the return of the big orange turd by crafting a document outlining all the messed up crap he wants to implement on Trumps first day in office.

Vought sees his and his organization’s mission as “renew[ing] a consensus of America as a nation under God,” per a statement on CRA’s website, and reshaping the government’s contract with the governed. Freedom of religion would remain a protected right, but Vought and his ideological brethren would not shy from using their administration positions to promote Christian doctrine and imbue public policy with it, according to both people familiar with the matter, granted anonymity to avoid retaliation. He makes clear reference to human rights being defined by God, not man.

First, I highly doubt that freedom of religion would remain a protected right. Currently, there are Christian lawmakers that have been trying to get Satanism removed from the list of recognized religions, and this is only the tip of the iceberg. These psychos will do just about anything to make sure their religion is top dog, and it wouldn’t surprise me if other faiths were soon on the chopping block.

Second, what I find terrifying is the renewed confidence of these assholes in thinking that the rest of us will just sit back and let this happen. They live in such a bubble that they think the majority of Americans feel the way they do. It simply isn’t the case. Most Christians are not dominionists, and considering how many different denominations there are, to treat them as a one large group has never really worked. Although we may not like it, atheists have to ally themselves with those faith groups that are strongly opposed to this kind of sectarian agenda.

Lastly, atheists have to get off their asses and start making moves themselves. Christians have been infiltrating governments for decades, and this strategy is starting to bare fruit. If we sit back and let other people get involved, than we shouldn’t be surprised if we end up with targets on our backs. The stakes are high, and we can no longer bury our heads in the sand hoping that people will drop religion like a bad habit.

LifeWise Academy Needs to be Stopped


It has to be strange to be the bad guy, and not know it. When you hold onto a belief that claims that you are righteous, there’s no limit to the depraved and corrupt things you’ll do to makes sure everyone around you thinks the same way.

Some of you may remember that we covered this creepy organization in the past. Lifewise academy is a Christian Nationalist organization that seeks to indoctrinate kids into their club. In states like Ohio, Arkansas and Georgia, these busy bees have been able to operate with impunity, as US courts are increasingly becoming friendly to the notion of letting religious organizations proselytize during school hours.

The way these guys get around the obvious issue with teaching religion in schools is that they will “bus” kids out somewhere else, and teach them off campus. This is a loophole that is increasingly being exploited.

Now, some groups have pushed back .For instance, Satanist groups are now also doing the same, partly to offer an alternative to Lifewise, but also to outrage parents with the notion that they might be getting brainwashed (Satanists groups don’t engage in any religious teachings. Rather, they usually just offer extra curricular activities).

In response, lawmakers are trying to ban Satanism, and get it’s tax exempt status revoked. Typical strategy by Christians who don’t think the rules apply to them. If you want to support their effort, I encourage you to make a donation.

The part that really gets to me are the bogus claims that these extra curricular religious programs somehow help the students do better in schools. There are no studies to back this up, not that I expect religious zealots to know how to conduct such a study. These guys have never heard of sourcing anything, so if you were hoping for proof, that’s one word religious people have never fully comprehended anyways.

Arizona Senator Comes to Defense of Satanism

Here’s something I never thought I would say: A US senator has come to the defense of Satanists, mainly due to the fact that Christian Nationalists have decided that this “parody” religion is their new bugbear. Democratic Senator Juan Mendez addressed the fact that their colleagues are trying to “ban” the religion, and this has outraged overly sensitive Christians who still think the organization is evil.

“They are here today to confront the arbitrary, tyrannical authority of religious persecution that’s scheduled for government committee later on today,” he continued. “We are graced with the presence of ministers and members of the Satanic Temple of “The mission of the satanic temple is to encourage benevolence and empathy among all people,” he added. “They embrace practical common sense and justice. They are guided by their conscience to undertake noble pursuits that fulfill their religious values… I welcome them to the floor today.”

Mendez is referring to the recent attempt by Republican lawmakers to try and outlaw Satanism, which has been taking up the fight for separation of church and state. He’s keenly aware of just how much these groups are enraging Republican lawmaker. It’s awesome to watch.

What’s hilarious is that the article I have linked to states that “The Democrat senator was slammed on social media after welcoming the devil worshippers to the capitol with open arms.” If you actually bother to read the comment section of the Republican Twitter account, you might see a few religious dummies attacking Mendez, however the vast majority of the replies point out that religious toleration means you have to accept faiths that you don’t like. Atheists are used to this, but for Christians, anything less than a complete domination of the religious sphere is unacceptable.

It’s nice to know that not ever government official is a religious nutbag. Gives you a little hope for the future.

 

West Virginia Senate wants Creationism in School

In American politics, the only thing their government is capable of, is trying to pass laws that serve the religious community. Forget about actually trying to balance the budget, or reform immigration. The most important thing is to make sure that kids are protected from all that secularism in schools!

For example, in West Virginia, their state senate has been a bunch of busy bees. Not passing any bills that are meaningful mind you. No, they were too busy passing bills to introduce creationism in classrooms, only to top it off with a bill to mandatorily display “In God We Trust”.

Sen. Amy Grady, R-Mason, chair of the Senate Education Committee, said SB 280 would prohibit public school boards, public school superintendents and public school principals in K-12 from preventing teachers from “discussing or answering questions from students about scientific theories” related to the origins of the universe and how life came to exist.

This kind of vague language is meant to introduce creationist propaganda into the classroom. They like to pretend that “intelligent design” is a scientific theory, which only demonstrates how little they understand the term. Its vagueness could also spell tons of lawsuits for violating the Establishment Clause of the constitution.

So what was the point in all of this? Again, religious people are so scared that they are in danger of becoming extinct that they are doubling down on forcing religion on the rest of us. My guess is that this will actually blow up in their faces. The more we see this type of encroachment, the more people will react negatively. Hopefully, this will have some influence in the polls, especially for people who want meaningful legislation, no showboating for their imaginary friend in the sky.

 

Texas Approves Chaplains in Schools

When are religious people going to stop shoving their faith down our throats? The answer is never. Just ask non-Christian parent at Grapevine’s Independent School District in Texas. The board recently approved the hiring of chaplains at the school, a move that’s angered many parents. During one recent meeting, a number of them were kicked out, or walked out in protest.

They are angry that these men, who have no training as councilors, are being paid with state funds to proselytize to students during school hours. Despite all the protest, the National School Chaplain Association thinks there is nothing wrong with the move:

“School chaplaincy, just like chaplaincy in other U.S. institutions, is perfectly legal and consistently upheld by the Supreme Court. School chaplaincy programs follow specific regulations that prohibit proselytizing, offering services based on consent. Simply put, chaplains don’t represent religion or the church, they represent God.”

That doesn’t mean anything to people who don’t share your embrace of an imaginary lord. The fact of the matter is that the faithful are in the business of converting people and asserting their dominance, and this is just another form if it. It also is an open visitation for lawsuits, which in the end is only going to cost the taxpayers more money.

Why can’t they just keep their religion to themselves, you may wonder. It seems that while one side of their mouths pretends to want to live and let live, constantly going on about how loving their god is, the other side openly prays for our destruction. The Supreme Court has upheld chaplaincy programs only because its members have capitulated to religion. Their oath to the Constitution is a joke, a minor inconvenience in the quest to make America into a Christian nation. They are slowly succeeding, despite the fact that more and more of Americans are departing from religion. This is the reason why they are fighting so hard to shove it down our throats: they figure that unless they take action now, the demise of religion is inevitable.

Iowa Capital Satanic Display Causes Outrage

It’s been a banner year for Satan. Not only has he been helping to shut down countless school promotions of religions, but in his spare time, he’s been helping to freak out some poor Iowans, but making them have to put up a display in order to contravene the nativity one that was allowed in the Capitol Building.

The state Governor was less than enthusiastic, but as her Republican colleagues reminded her, the very first amendment of their beloved Constitution does not allow for the establishment or specific endorsement of one religion, and so in order to have their display, there would have to be allowance for others.

“Today, faithful Iowans gathered in the Capitol rotunda to display the Nativity and pray for peace,” she wrote on social media. “Free speech is a right afforded to all. But how we use it matters. Today’s event is proof that in the battle between good and evil, good will always prevail.”

The way religious people speak always drives me crazy. This isn’t a battle between good and evil; it’s a fight to keep religious nonsense out of government. The whole reason this satanic display exists in the first place is to act as a counter to all the Christian propaganda that pops up every holiday season. These morons actually think that the folks who put up the Satanic display praise the dark lord. They can’t fathom that it’s simply epic trolling.

How can we ever win when people are that deluded? Sometimes it all feels like a gigantic waste of time trying to change their minds. Still, there’s bound to be a few people that realize the hypocrisy at work. It might be the push they need to throw off the shackles of this ancient superstition. That’s all we can hope for at this point!

Denmark Criminalizes Koran Burning

Denmark is failing as a nation. It is failing for the same reasons many other European countries are struggling right now: the rapid influx of Muslim immigrants has ramped up sectarian tensions, and now, as a response, the government has reacted in the most cowardly way possible to the mounting violent rhetoric of Islamic fundamentalists: they are kowtowing to the faithful, ensuring that hurt feelings take precedence over liberal values. So, now if anyone has the balls to express their free speech right by burning the Koran, they face up to two years in jail for causing a disturbance that could lead to violence.

The purpose of the law is to counter “the systematic mockery” that, among other things, has contributed to intensifying the threat of terrorism in Denmark, the Ministry of Justice said.

Allow me to translate this sentence, as it failed to properly provide context to what is happening: in order to prevent Muslims living in their own country from committing violent acts of retribution, the government has decided that instead of honoring its commitment to free speech, it would rather cower to a religion that respects neither free speech nor secularism. What are we fighting for, if not our own downfall?

Denmark had previously gotten rid of its blasphemy laws, but it seems now that their society is regressing, thanks to an immigration policy that puts their own values at risk. This means that the counter-reaction of the population will undoubtedly make matters worst. We are sure to witness the resurgence of far right political candidates, who favor anti-immigration stances in response to these kinds of laws. This will be especially true after the next terrorist attack, which given the current political climate, seems almost like an inevitability.

The broader problem in my opinion, is that progressives are too naïve to understand the threat that Islam poses to modern civilization. The conflict in Israel has created a litany of confusing and contradictory alliances, such as “Gays for Palestine”, who unknowingly betray their gay brethren for the sake of appearing welcoming and open minded. The fact that Hamas has openly called for, and participated in the murder of young gay men seems more than a minor inconvenience. Even a few decapitated heads doesn’t seem to register much of a response from the LGBT community, if only because it threatens to make everyone’s lives messy by acknowledging it. The world is a complicated place. The idea that gay Palestinians often seek asylum in Israel, out of fear that they will be killed by their fellow man because an ancient barbaric tome claims that same sex attractions are wrong, conflicts with the narrative that there is a good guy and a bad guy.

I’ve often said that liberalism is under attack; not by without, but from within. Soft-headed liberals who sacrificed integrity for intersectionality have allowed vile religions like Islam to benefit from their protection, all the while oblivious that their benefactors secretly plot to destroy them. If countries like Denmark are an indication of how things are going, the news is not good.