Author Archives: Jacob Fortin

Creationist Pimp Harun Yahya is back

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Remember Harun Yahya? He’s the Turkish creationist that published a book called “The Atlas of Creation”, his attempt to “prove” that animals were created spontaneously by his personal God. Most of the pictures in this massive 768 page monstrosity are ripped right off the Internet. One picture of a fly is in fact a metal lure. Yes, he’s that fucking incompetent.

Harun Yahya is the pseudonym of Adnan Oktar, 55, a preacher who keeps secret the sources of the ample funds that allow him and a group of followers to produce hundreds of thousands of slick and simple books on Islam under his pen name.

Harun has a following of young, wealthy religious aristocrats that fund his various schemes. He keeps them in line by filming them having sex with his various private prostitutes, and in exchange for their silence, they fund his various enterprises. Although he claims to have written a dozen books, all have been found to be ghost written, and he’s clearly authored none of them. He’s an opportunist, interested in the money, fame and power that comes from “defending the faith”.

Koran-based creationist views are traditional in the Muslim world. Advised by U.S. creationists, Harun Yahya has developed a series of books that have helped spread this view in recent years beyond the Middle East, including to France, whose five million Muslims make up Europe’s largest Islamic minority.

Right now, he’s on tour in Europe trying to “teach” students how to challenge evolution, which he believes is science’s way of promoting atheism. Is it our fault that evolution by means of natural selection does more to explain our existence than a 7th century book of mythology?

Kelowna atheist bus ads get stolen

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So, even though we expected this kind of juvenile behavior from some of our neighbors down south, Kelwona BC has the distinction of not only being the first city to have atheist ads stolen; they also failed to report the theft, so there’s no way to know when it actually disappeared. All in all, it’s pretty fucked up.

Raped Teen forced to apologize before church for being pregnant

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After Christina Anderson was raped by fellow congregationalist Ernest Willis and got pregnant as a result, the pastor of her fundamentalist Baptist church forced her to move to Colorado and read an apology letter aloud to her congregation before she left. Classy.

Ernest Willis is charged with forcibly raping Christina Anderson twice during the summer of 1997, when she was his children’s baby sitter and he was 39. Lawyers for Willis, now 52, say in court documents that he will admit having sex with the girl once but maintains it was consensual.

Ah, the old Polanski defense. Wonder how well it’ll work for him considering Willis’ defense team is also trying to bar Anderson’s testimony that he tried to offer to drive her to get an out of state abortion, and he also offered a “code 3“, effectively a punch to the stomach in the hopes of causing a spontaneous abortion. Why, those sound like the actions of a man engaged in a consensual affair, doesn’t it?

Pastor Phelps claims he helped the police investigation, but he’s obviously a liar since the cops only discovered where Christina was after friends tipped them off that she was living under a different name in Arizona, where she was being home-schooled by other fundy yahoos.

It’s a proud tradition in all Abrahamic religions that girls are to blame for everything. In the Bible, when Aaron and Miriam both complain Moses’ new wife is a foreign chick, only Miriam gets leprosy for her questioning of the prophet. How many females have been tortured, beaten to death, or immolated under the watchful gaze of the Church?

(Update: Ernest Willis was found guilty and sentenced)

Street Preacher gets PWNED

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See, to shut up these fools sometimes you just need a little music…

Rome braces for urban myth Earthquake

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Hey, if you’re going to be superstitious, you may as well embrace all the crazy and stupid shit you hear, right? That includes an urban myth floating around Rome that an earthquake is supposed to destroy them today. This quake was apparently foretold decades ago by a famous scientist by the name of Raffaele Bendandi, although there is no evidence that he actually did so. So basically, a number of citizens have “called in sick” believing today is their last day on Earth.

There are reports of an 18% increase in the number of city employees planning to stay away from work. “I’m going to tell the boss I’ve got a medical appointment and take the day off,” barman Fabio Mengarelli told Reuters. “If I have to die, I want to die with my wife and kids, and masses of people will do the same as me.”

All of this is pretty silly, since earthquakes can’t be predicted so far in advance. Turns out our mantle is a lot more unpredictable than we think. Just ask Japan. Point is, this is just another example of how gullible people are when they have such a poor understanding of science. I bet most of these people can name more patron saints than they can scientists. Is it any surprise that you would have a large radius of ignorance when the Vatican is next door?

Another beautiful Carl Sagan video

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How can anyone think that it’s we, the materialists, that lack imagination and poetry? What could be more poetic, more humbling than the natural world? I’m not sure how anyone who listens to classic Carl Sagan can imagine their own fairy tale bullshit is more “inspired”. Nonsense is never more compelling than objective reality, especially if you bother to actually study it.

Uganda ready to kill gays again

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It’s become exceedingly clear that it’s only a matter of time before Uganda passes their “kill the gays” bill, and while there are plenty of people trying to pressure President Museveni and his administration into not signing the bill, the people seem to be overwhelmingly for it. So while a site like allout.org is encouraging folks to sign a petition, I’m of the opinion that we need to give political asylum to all gays in the country. Only then can we ensure their survival. I don’t want to be mean or dismissive, but petitions don’t do shit, and the people of Uganda are out for blood. They blame gays for all of their troubles, and if that sounds vaguely familiar to you, that’s because every pogrom in history starts off like this.

Lame Pastor lies about being in Navy SEALS

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After being interviewed for a piece on the armed forces by the Patriot-News – a scrappy little Pennsylvania Newspaper that despite its small readership still manages to win accolades – it was discovered that Rev. Jim Moats was not in fact a Navy Seal, and that he had fabricated a story based on the movie “Under Siege”.

“We deal with these guys all the time, especially the clergy. It’s amazing how many of the clergy are involved in those lies to build that flock up,” Shipley said.

I guess when you’re trying to impress your new flock, you’re bound to embellish things a little. In Moats’ case, he had his two sons make him a fake Navy Seals plaque and simply didn’t correct people who assumed that he must have fought in Vietnam as a special op. He didn’t, and when a real newspaper actually bothered to check up on the story, they found out that they had been duped. So they went back, confronted this lying moron, and got him to confess he’s been pretending all this time to be a hot shot when he’s merely a cowardly liar. Do you expect anything else from guys who make their living spewing nonsense professionally?

More Wife-Beating debates

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You’ve got to be impressed with any culture that has a televised debate on the merits of wife beating according to the Koran. Hey, here’s a fucking idea: stop trying to reconcile modern values with a book written in the 7th century.

Derek, I hardly knew you

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It’s a terrible shame when your only opportunity to know someone is on the day of their death. Derek Miller, an atheist blogger not unlike myself, died of cancer recently. His last post, from “beyond the grave” is a reminder of the fragility of life. Derek had been fighting a losing battle to colon cancer, and passed away a few days ago. Reading his archive, it also reminded me there are still tons of great atheist bloggers out there that haven’t been discovered. If you know of any we haven’t talked about in the past, and you would like others to know about it before these people expire, be sure to let me know!

*(Update: His site exists only in the web archives now)

Pastor busted for selling off baby formula meant for poor

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Isn’t it hilarious how religious people are utterly convinced believing in the absurd makes them better people? Despite plenty of proof to the contrary, it never seems to register that for the most part, religion makes people more xenophobic, more racist, more likely to support torture, and more ignorant. How are you supposed to be more moral when that’s the case?

If Christianity is supposed to make you more law abiding and moral (I chuckle every time I actually say that out loud), then we should expect the so-called “experts” in its theology to be shining beacons of moral rectitude. Of course, we all know that’s not the case. If they aren’t shoving their penises in inappropriate places or beating the crap out of orphans, some of them are just trying to get paid:

A 67-year-old Roman Catholic priest was arrested at his Queenstown church mission for allegedly selling baby formula meant to be given free to underprivileged children.

The priest was arrested on Thursday afternoon while allegedly selling the milk to the public, after police and the Eastern Cape health department were alerted to the trade, Daily Dispatch reported on Friday

Nice job, dude. Guys like you make disparaging religion easy.

William Lane Craig tries to defend Biblical genocides

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A few weeks ago I posted a video of a debate between Sam Harris and William Lane Craig. The video made it clear that Craig is no dummy, despite believing in absurdities. He’s been particularly busy recently defending the faith, and one of his latest articles tries to justify the genocide and infanticide in the Bible. It’s pretty messed up, actually:

According to the Pentateuch (the first five books of the Old Testament), when God called forth his people out of slavery in Egypt and back to the land of their forefathers, he directed them to kill all the Canaanite clans who were living in the land (Deut. 7.1-2; 20.16-18). The destruction was to be complete: every man, woman, and child was to be killed.

The command to kill all the Canaanite peoples is jarring precisely because it seems so at odds with the portrait of Yahweh, Israel’s God, which is painted in the Hebrew Scriptures. Contrary to the vituperative rhetoric of someone like Richard Dawkins, the God of the Hebrew Bible is a God of justice, long-suffering, and compassion.

We’ve obviously read a different book. God doesn’t strike me for one second as having any kind of compassion at all. He kills people for burning incense improperly. He commands his “people” to kill all the other tribes who happen to live around them. This whole “God is love” shit is a pretty recent phenomenon. Just ask Pope Innocent III.

According to the version of divine command ethics which I’ve defended, our moral duties are constituted by the commands of a holy and loving God. Since God doesn’t issue commands to Himself, He has no moral duties to fulfill. He is certainly not subject to the same moral obligations and prohibitions that we are.

In other words, if the commands of an all loving God sound evil, it’s only because good and evil are not really concepts he has to worry about, since he’s not subject to his own moral laws. In other words, if God does something we consider evil, like command the Jews to slaughter innocent people, it only seems that way to us because we’re subject to moral laws, not God.

So the problem isn’t that God ended the Canaanites’ lives. The problem is that He commanded the Israeli soldiers to end them. Isn’t that like commanding someone to commit murder? No, it’s not. Rather, since our moral duties are determined by God’s commands, it is commanding someone to do something which, in the absence of a divine command, would have been murder. The act was morally obligatory for the Israeli soldiers in virtue of God’s command, even though, had they undertaken it on their own initiative, it would have been wrong.

Wow. So if I kill my neighbor, I’m committing an evil act. However if a voice in my head told me to do so, it’s kosher. Good to know!

God taught Israel that any assimilation to pagan idolatry is intolerable. It was His way of preserving Israel’s spiritual health and posterity. God knew that if these Canaanite children were allowed to live, they would spell the undoing of Israel.

Yeah, clearly little children who remember nothing of their parents equally stupid religious beliefs would have been a major threat. Better that they should all be smashed against rocks, right?

Moreover, if we believe, as I do, that God’s grace is extended to those who die in infancy or as small children, the death of these children was actually their salvation.

See, that’s the kind of ignorant shit that drives us crazy. You’re literally suggesting they were in fact saved by being brutally murdered. That’s just fucking ignorant.

Muslim actress threatened over Playboy pictures

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When I think of someone famous taking off their clothing for money and more attention, it’s rare that I compare their actions to those of great revolutionaries. Of course, that’s probably because I live in a society that values freedom of expression, and where the female form isn’t something we like covered up (which is why winter sucks so hard). That’s why I had to take a few moments to appreciate the fact that a German Muslim actress named Sila Sahin has received death threats after posing nude for Playboy.

Her Turkish parents are apparently uber-conservative and called her all kinds of nasty names for doing what she wants with her own body.

“For years I subordinated myself to various societal constraints. The Playboy photo shoot was a total act of liberation.”

You know you’re on the side of good when you’re trying to defend a society that has citizens who feel liberated when they show people their naughty parts!

Kiwi youths uninformed about Easter

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How did your Zombie Jesus Weekend turn out? Personally I stuffed myself with food and partied way too hard, but it’s pretty much the only way most people I know tend to celebrate. In fact, it looks like most of New Zealand has no fucking clue what the holiday is actually about. According to a super unscientific survey they did, kids are generally ignorant as to the history and purpose of Easter. It’s hilarious:

The 10-question survey, which asked basic questions about Christ’s death and resurrection, returned a mean test score of 5 out of 10…The question as to whom betrayed Christ confused a number of others, with one young respondent believing it was his dog who was disloyal. Another was hazy about the entire concept of Easter.

I remember that part in the Bible when Old Yeller betrays Jesus too. Bastard.

A 16-year-old believed Christ was referred to as “King of the World”, and was crucified wearing a “halo made of bunnies”.

A halo made of bunnies.. How does that even work?

All of this is a positive sign that no one really gives a damn about Christianity enough to pass on their stupid stories to the next generation. So while some may lament about this, the rest of us secularists can take comfort that the world is slowly losing its religious flavor. It might take a while, but it looks like we might be on the winning side after all.

Negligent mother thanks invisible friend for rescued baby

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Imagine you’re a shitty parent, and your unsupervised 16 month old falls through the balcony railing of your 4 story hotel room and into the arms of a resourceful passer-by. Is your first instinct to thank your invisible friend in the sky for the rescue?

Jah-Nea Myles, 16 months, apparently slipped through the balcony railing and fell into the arms of Helen Beard.

Ms. Beard, of Worksop, was at the pool at Orlando’s Econo Lodge hotel when she saw the baby hanging from the railing and ran underneath, she said.

Ms. Myles told Reuters: “I’m thanking the Lord above right now for saving my child’s life. I’m also thanking that lady because she was an angel sent from heaven.”

It wasn’t your Iron Age God, or one of his sexless servants who saved your kid; it was a young woman from Worksop, England with a head on her shoulders.