Category Archives: Blog

Honor Killing was totally justified says shitty father

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Every so often, I hear someone claim that honor killings have nothing to do with Islam. While it’s true that the practice is actually older than the religion (it is, after all, the “new kid on the block” compared to the other two Abrahamic Religions), it seems as though this barbaric ritual has found fertile ground in this religion. While the practice has its roots in much older Arab patriarchal societies that tried desperately to control women’s reproductive rights, it’s now become a kind of punishment for any perceived infraction of their twisted morality.

Take the story of 17 year old Rand Abdel-Qader as an example: this young women had the misfortune of falling in love with a British soldier stationed in Basra, and when the family found out about the infatuation (the innocence of which cannot be overstated), they teamed up to strangle her to death and left her body in an unmarked shallow grave. Her father’s only regret now is that he did not murder his daughter while she was still an innocent child:

‘Death was the least she deserved,’ said Abdel-Qader. ‘I don’t regret it. I had the support of all my friends who are fathers, like me, and know what she did was unacceptable to any Muslim that honours his religion,’ he said.
‘I have only two boys from now on. That girl was a mistake in my life. I know God is blessing me for what I did,’ he said, his voice swelling with pride. ‘My sons are by my side, and they were men enough to help me finish the life of someone who just brought shame to ours.’

If you’re hoping for some kind of happy ending to this story (like this shitty father being incarcerated for murder), then I’m sorry to inform you that the cops were congratulating him for having the balls to kill his own child. The worst they’ve done is fire him from his job, although the local government official did give him money to lay low in Jordan for a while. Isn’t it nice to know you have the support of your community when you’re an infanticidal, religious douche bag?

Canadian Imam learns important lesson about Muslim “Brotherhood”

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If you’re planning to take a pilgrimage to Medina, you might want to make sure that you’re practicing “Islam” the way the locals want you to. That’s a lesson a Canadian Imam by the name of Usama Al-Atar learned rather painfully, as he was singled out from a prayer group, strangled, beaten, and then taken to jail.

According to CTV, he’s been released, but details are extremely sketchy. The police claim that he assaulted someone, but according to witnesses, the religious police found his praying to be “inappropriate” and quickly mobilized to silence him.

Let’s remember that Saudi Arabia is still the only country on earth where women aren’t allowed to drive or vote (although this is supposedly changing in 2015). Typically, this isn’t a very positive sign. Are we really that surprised that they would also mistreat foreign visitors, accuse them of crimes they didn’t commit, then lay bogus charges on them? What the fuck did this guy expect when entering one of the most religiously conservative countries in the world?

I hope this serves as a lesson for any other Muslim thinking of travelling to the country for a pilgrimage: in their eyes, you’re probably worshiping wrong, and they’re going to do something about it.

Reno atheists get the job done

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Fan of the show William is beaming with pride, and with good reason: he’s a member of the Reno Coalition of Reason, and they’re celebrating the erection of this billboard, asking: “are you good without God? Millions are!”. It’s great to see how effective atheists have gotten at organizing and spreading the word that non-believers aren’t a fringe group. We’re much larger than anyone imagines, and we’re getting pretty sick and tired of religious people shoving their religion (among other things) down our throats.

Congratulations on getting the job done, boys and girls!

Shirley Phelps drops by TGA to say “you’ll burn in Hell, Nate”

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About a year ago, Carisa recorded Nate Phelps’ presentation “On the Grayness of Life“, in which he recounts his life as a member of America’s most notorious family, the Phelps. Truth be told, I kind of forgot about the whole thing (since blog turnover on content is so quick), but it seems as though the matriarch of the family, Shirley Phelps-Roeper, actually bothered to visit the site and ensure that Nate knows exactly what will happen to him for escaping his father’s abuse:

Nate should be grateful that my father never did what it says in Leviticus 20:9 – “Any person who curses his father or mother shall therefore be put to death. Since he has cursed his father or mother, he shall be stoned to death.”

He’s still going to burn in Hell for all eternity, so the Lord will have his revenge against his decadent, rebellious ways.

Thanks for dropping by Shirley. We’ll be sure to let Nate know that your diseased mind is fantasizing about him burning in Hell for all eternity.

Cindy Jacobs is batshit crazy

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If you’re unfamiliar with the insanity of Cindy Jacobs, I have the misfortune of introducing you to a special kind of crazy bitch. Imagine if Marcia Gay Harden’s character in the movie “The Mist” had somehow found a way to traverse the fantasy barrier and crossed over into the real world (yes, I know it’s a terrible movie plot, but someone should have said that to Arnold Schwarzenegger) In January of 2011, she claimed that the mysterious death of thousands of migratory birds was the result of God punishing the world (through animal proxy, of course) for gays being allowed to serve in the military. Here she’s opposing the “Occupy Wall Street” protesters, claiming that all of this is really the work of the devil, who intends to try and take rich people’s money away.

It’s ironic that she talks about class warfare when her own organization’s aims sound very much like that of a paramilitary group, or the kind of mission statement you’d expect from a super-villain group:

Generals International is an international movement that thrives to reform the nations of the world. We are achieving societal transformation through intercession and the prophetic. Together, the staff works to expand the Kingdom of God by bearing the vision of Generals International to reform the nations of the world through the ministry of the prophetic.

The irony in all of this is that Jacobs and her ilk are attempting something similar with their 40 days 40 nights campaign (let’s call it “Occupy Washington”) in order to transform it into the “District of Christ“. It’s ok though: they’re doing it for the Lord;  not a bunch of lazy bums that blame all of their problems on rich people (well, the ones that stole their pensions, anyways).  When you’re working for the Lord, you’ve got an important job to do:

While many want to wear the label of intercessor, few are willing to pay the price to hear the still small voice of God. The intercessor petitions the throne of God with the desires of God for His people. It is not about asking God for selfish desires that can be used on our own lust, it is about discerning the will of God and then giving Him agreement and petitioning Him to implement His will on earth. A true intercessor prays God’s Word back to Him. Since God seeks voluntary lovers, we have the opportunity to cooperate with Him to implement His will on Earth. “Your will be done in Earth as it is in Heaven” is not an empty platitude; it is the vision statement for God’s original intent for mankind.

What bugs me about these kinds of power hungry madmen (or madwomen) is this idea they have that their crazy ambitions are a kind of desirable piety. It’s all for someone else in their eyes, you see. So every dollar they embezzle in their little “world reformation” plan is regarded, unquestioningly, as the will of Jesus (who is going to eventually show up any moment and claim the place, but they’ll gladly take the keys in the meantime).  And lo it’s a miracle! Their savior believes in precisely the same things they do. Hallelujah!

School demolishes chapel, replaces it with science classrooms

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Finally, some good news coming out of the UK. It seems a public school founded 500 years ago by the Dean of St. Paul’s Cathedral has decided to demolish its chapel in favor of building science classrooms. Can you imagine a more cheerful sign of progress?

St Paul’s School in south west London has knocked down its chapel to make way for new science classrooms, becoming the first of the country’s leading public schools to do without a place of worship.

While £5 million has been spent on a new theatre and £4 million on a sports complex, no money has been made available for a replacement chapel.

There are now plans to start saving money in 2020 to pay for the construction of the remaining buildings, but no date has been assigned to the chapel, leading to fears that it will be seen as expendable.

What’s the point? In a few decades, there won’t be enough religious rubes to pay for the damn thing anyways. What is a chapel but a testament to our own ignorance and superstition? I love the fact that a school originally founded by a church has made the decision to move forward and abandon its religious roots. It’s proof that the power of these institutions is seriously starting to wane. A few more decades, and they’ll hopefully be just a painful distant memory…

IHOP 24 hour prayer session does nothing

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Remember these wackos? A few weeks ago, The International House of Prayer and their fearless leader Mike Bickle, made headlines after accusing Oprah Winfrey of being the Anti-Christ. These people are not to be underestimated. Since its humble beginnings, the church has grown by leaps and bounds. It’s recently opened a four-year Bible college, and plans of building a massive 100 million dollar church complex (which will undoubtedly be a gaudy monstrosity).

Their whole schtick involves a 24/hour, 7 day a week prayer session that never stops. It’s supposedly been going on for 12 years (I have my doubts about this claim), and in order to accomplish this, young volunteers pledge to spend a minimum of 25 hours a week at the church, often in late night shifts. They’ve been praying for gay marriage and abortion to be made illegal. Fortunately, they’re talking to their imaginary friend the whole time, so all of this prayin’ has done precisely shit in actually changing anything. Of course, this whole effort probably feels inspiring to the members, which explains why they’ve been growing so fast. They have vision, and regardless of how frightening it is (they subscribe to the “Seven Mountain Dominionism” scary bullshit), that’s what these kind of people want from their church these days: a clear idea of how to change society to fit their narrow worldview.

Life imitates Art for woman in Iran

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It’s hilarious how most Muslims are convinced that their restrictive religious repression of women is somehow intended to protect them. You hear this all the time in Islamic countries; they think we let our women “run around unprotected” while they “bravely” restrict every part of their lives in the misguided belief that it’s really all for their own good. The culture of Islam makes women seem like dangerous, seductive weapons that cloud the judgement of men. Why else would they execute victims of rape, if not to vindicate the idea that it is always the woman’s fault for seducing the rapist in the first place?

In the light of this prism, the slavery of women is viewed as an extension of man’s submission to God, but as the old adage goes: ladies first! Rebelliousness, seen in any light, is to be extinguished, as was the case with actress Marzieh Vafamehr, who found out herself living out the plot of her new movie “My Tehran for Sale“. The scenario involves a young woman struggling to live in a country of contradictions, where young people live secret lives together in a brutal religious theocracy. This important movie is currently being distributed on the sly, since the country has banned it.

According to an interview with the director of the movie, the government sought a number of bogus charges, including failure to cover her hair with a hijab, consuming alcohol on set, and being part of the production (she wasn’t). The sentence is the kind of thing you’d expect from a theocratic and misogynistic society: 90 red-hot lashes and a whole year of rotting in jail, all for the “crime” of acting in someone else’s movie. Considering the number of women that often fail to survive the aftermath of such unnecessary brutality, I hope she’s made of tougher stuff.

The contradictory nature of Iran is why there are really two pictures of this place: one filled with young women who live out their lives in a secret world that resembles our own, and the other populated by religious thugs who patrol the streets looking for these secret places. When these worlds clash, the only ones to bother talking about it tend to be Persian Christian Missionaries operating out of the Alpharetta, Georgia. Their presence there only exacerbates the situation of course; religion is precisely the problem in Iran. Another faith is hardly the solution.

We have to ask ourselves what we can do ourselves to expose the evils of this religion outside of the sphere of influence of Christianity. It’s our duty to see that the injustices of any faith are given the proper attention they deserve. Until we do, how can we continue to claim the moral high ground?

Harold Camping does it again

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There’s a new End Date, True Unbelievers. Harold Camping brings the good news of Armageddon, and you don’t have to wait very long: It’s October 21st!

Honestly, I thought the dude was dead after I saw that last video of him shying away from the spotlight after yet another failed prophesy. I’d feel sorry for this old man if it wasn’t for the fact that he’s a bigoted jackass who wants the world to erupt in bloodshed. That’s what Rapture is: a genocidal fantasy.

77 reasons to support bigotry

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The Friendly Atheist has an interesting article written by two fans who recently attended a “Marriage Symposium” organized by the Illinois Family Institute and Patriots United (any time an organization has the words “Family” or “Patriot” in it, you know something racist/homophobic/ultra-conservative is going on). One of the pieces of literature at the event that intrigued me was the pamphlet entitled “77 Non-Religious Reasons to Support Man/Women Marriage“, (sounds more positive than “oppose civil rights, doesn’t it?).  This testament to ignorance has so many gems in it, I found it difficult to choose which one was my favorite…

#18: Without man/woman marriage, there will be no institution specifically protecting the right of children to be in a relationship with both parents.

[Translation: If gays are allowed to marry, parents will mysteriously be unable to have a relationship with their kids because gay sex is gross]

#22. If the love between adults were the only important factor, we would expect stepparents to be interchangeable with biological parents. But this is not generally the case.

[Translation: Because you don’t love your step-dad hard enough, “Todd and Fred” shouldn’t be allowed to care for another human being.]

#29 Same-Sex Marriage makes an implicit statement that mothers and fathers are interchangeable, and sex is irrelevant to parenting. The burden should be on those who make this strong, non-intuitive claim.

[Did religious people just say that the burden of proof is on people making extraordinary claims? Shocking. If proof can be shown that the gender of the parents makes no difference at all – say from a study conducted by the American Psychological Association– would they be willing to accept it?]

#32 Mothers and fathers each make unique contributions to the child’s development. Father’s absence creates risks in children that mother’s absence does not create.

[Translation: Dad’s are more important than moms. After all, they’re more likely to physically and sexually abuse their kids, based primarily on factors such as feelings of self worth, unemployment and substance abuse. Does that mean poor people shouldn’t have kids?]

#33 Teenage boys without fathers are at risk for juvenile delinquency, violence, criminal activity, gang membership and incarceration.

[Hey, I know a way that this kid could have not one, but two dads, making him twice as likely not to turn out shitty! Hint: it involves some degree of butt-sex]

#41 Once same sex marriage becomes legally and socially acceptable, more women will decide to raise children together. They will view this as easier than putting forth the effort of crossing the gender divide and cooperating with a man through marriage.

[Translation: Men will become increasingly marginalized because all women will magically lose their intense desire for sexual and emotional intimacy with the opposite sex, since men are such hard work that it’s not really worth it.]

#55 The judges who imposed same sex marriage in Iowa stated “The research…suggest that the traditional notion that children need a mother and father to be raised into a healthy, well-adjusted adults is based more on stereotypes than anything else.” This is not true as a general statement

[Translation: We refuse to accept any evidence that contradicts what we already know to be true.]

#57 If enough judges say enough implausible things, people will lose respect for the law.
[Translation: If the law doesn’t work to our advantage, we’ll ignore it.]

#60 By the time the activists are finished, there will be nothing left of marriage but a government registry of friendships

[Translation: if gays are allowed the same rights as everyone else, they’ll ruin it the same way they ruined Glee clubs, male cheerleading, and fashion.]

You’ll notice the document sounds like the paranoid ravings of emotionally insecure people (mostly dads) afraid of losing their place in society. It makes sense: most of these movements are populated by old, racist white people; exactly the types of folks that see their power and influence diminish in today’s society. Their fears about an uncertain future (something every generation has had to face) has found a perfect focal point in the Gay Rights Movement. And because they see themselves as crusaders working for the benefit of children, they will interpret their increasingly marginalized views as the right ones. It matters little what society itself wants: they already know the desired outcome. Now all they need to do is try and work for it. I’m happy to report that these efforts will ultimately prove futile. If you don’t believe me, ask yourself this question: “were you convinced that same-sex marriage should be opposed after reading this logical juggernaut?”

Nintendo Jesus

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A fan found this article on Kotaku of a woman who supposedly found the image of Jesus on her old Nintendo. Truly it’s a message of hope for all of you gamers out there who worry that the “King of Kings” doesn’t approve of your lifestyle.

A Maryland woman said she was surprised to find what appears to be an image of Jesus Christ on the top of a used Nintendo Entertainment System she purchased on eBay for $US31 this week.

“We were inspecting it for cracks/damage and when we turned it just right into the light, the image showed up,” she said. “Our reaction was mainly curiosity at first. Then as we looked at it closer and ruled out what it couldn’t be, we began to get excited about it.”

They should be excited: think of how much money they can sell this console for now! Some gullible idiot paid $28,000 for a partially digested “Virgin Mary” grill-cheese sandwich, and that thing had to be encased in plastic to ensure it wouldn’t disintegrate into nothingness. Think of how much bread a hard-core Christian gamer will fork out for this piece of Jesus Junk? It’ll be way more than 31 bucks, I can guarantee you that!

Is this the best Christian Apologists can do?

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It ain’t easy being a Christian: sure, they might be the majority (for now), but every other day the faith is challenged by objective reality. While many Christians will scoff at the idea that their religion is in trouble, the truth is that countries like Canada, Sweden, and Australia are quickly shedding their religious coat in favor of a broader “spirituality” that doesn’t have to deal with the many inconsistencies or outright lies of organized religion. Over half of all Canadians, according to a recent survey, are convinced that religion does more harm than good.

Enter the Apologist. Their “job” is to try and defend their faith against the harshness of reality. Christian Apologetics have been around since the very founding of the religion; St. Paul was the first to begin the tradition when confronted by desert shepherds possessing some measure of skepticism. In the modern world, it’s much more difficult to defend the faith, and so a whole cottage industry has sprung up to meet the demands of increasingly skeptically-minded kids.

I spotted this article entitled “Top 10 Defences youth can give for their beliefs“, and I thought I might share with you the kind of “advice” they’re giving young Christians in a vain attempt to prevent them from leaving the religion in frustration. I think you’ll agree that any teenager attempting to use any of these arguments would be eaten alive by anyone with a moderate understanding of history or science:

1. How can you know for sure that anything is true?
Among your acquaintances are likely to be some people who don’t believe in truth. That is, they don’t believe truth can be known. However, that idea is easily refuted, as this fictional conversation in the 2011 novel, “The Quest”, illustrates:
It took a minute, but I finally realized what she was waiting for. “You’re saying that if I think that’s a true statement, then I’ve claimed to know something that is true….By saying truth can’t be known. I contradicted myself.”

Here the author tries to argue that if an agnostic claims that truth cannot be known, this itself is a truth-claim and the statement is therefore inconsistent. While it’s true that consistency is a desirable attribute of any philosophy, we have to examine what’s actually being argued instead of over-analyzing the statement itself. What is truth? How do we determine what’s real and what isn’t? Humans create models to explain the natural world, and while they can be amazingly accurate, there is still much to discover. We must accept that our understanding of the Universe is limited, flawed, but constantly improving. To claim otherwise is only possible when one sees the world through the arrogant prism of religion.

2. Is God a human invention?
A popular view these days is the idea that humans invented God in order to meet their needs and fulfill their desires. But it is at least as reasonable to believe exactly the opposite: that the innate desire humans have for God exists because there is Someone who satisfies that desire.

“Observe that noses were made to wear spectacles; and so we have spectacles.”- Voltaire. The fact that we have a tendency to see patternicity, agency and intentionality has more to do with our environment than some invisible man in the sky. For millions of years, our ancestors braved a cruel, violent world which placed survival above skepticism. As a result, we’ve inherited brains susceptible to superstition, and the persistence of religion in a world of scientific discovery is an excellent example of this.

3. Doesn’t the Big Bang disprove Creation?
There is a common misconception that the Big Bang has pretty much eliminated the idea that God created the heavens and the earth. But the opposite is true. Former atheist Antony Flew, in his book “There Is a God”, explained that the Big Bang model eventually led him to believe in a God who created the universe, because it pointed to a beginning point in the universe, and to something (or Someone) behind that beginning that was too big for science to explain.

So the Universe needs a beginning, but Super-Monkey doesn’t? The best science we have now tells us that a Universe can indeed come from nothing, so while the science we have today tells us that the Universe requires no supernatural “party-starter”, religionists can’t seem to abandon this lost “first” cause. I won’t pretend to know for certain that a god couldn’t have done this; however, our faithful opponents have still failed to provide a compelling explanation of their deity’s apparent ability to transcend the law of causality. Lastly, this idea that something can be “too big” for science is just an invitation to ignorance.

4. How can an intelligent person not believe in evolution?

Atheist Richard Dawkins has famously written, “Beyond doubt evolution is a fact,” adding that no reputable scientist disputes it. However, neither statement is true. First, it is necessary to understand what people mean when they use the world “evolution,” because it can refer to both micro-evolution (the observable process by which change happens over time within species) and macro-evolution (the arguable claim that starting with a common ancestor, over time simple organisms have changed into the species that exist today). Macro-evolution is not as widely accepted as some claim. In fact, more than eight hundred world-class scientists have signed a formal dissent from Darwinian evolution.

So, you’re willing to accept that species gradually change over time, but somehow still can’t grasp that over geological time-frames (millions of years), these incremental changes would form entirely new species? Also, if you want to put this whole “over 800 scientists express doubt about evolution” number into perspective, there are currently over a million scientists working in the US alone. 90% of all the scientists who have ever lived are alive today. The fact that you have 800 dummies on your side only proves that education is no guarantee of intelligence.

5. How can you trust the Bible when it has been changed and corrupted so much through the centuries?
I aimed to show everyone that Christianity was nonsense. I thought it would be easy. It wasn’t. In fact, I discovered that the Bible is far and away the most meticulously preserved and widely attested document of the ancient world. No other book even comes close (we go into greater detail on this subject in our book, “Don’t Check Your Brains at the Door”). This reliability was confirmed by the 1948 discovery of the Dead Sea Scrolls, which showed that after a thousand years of copying, the text as it appears in modern Bibles was more than ninety-five percent the same, word-for-word and letter-for-letter, as it had been three thousand years earlier! And what differences did exist were mainly spelling variations.

The relative consistency of nonsense is of little interest to us. The fact remains that the Bible is little more than a book of fairy-tales. The ancient stories of Gilgamesh and Enkidu have survived the ravages of time, and yet we do not believe that the ancient stories of Sumer are anything but poetic allegory. As a Christian, you’re far more likely to be asked “How can you trust the Bible to guide your morality when it advocates rape, incest, genocide, infanticide and cruelty?”. I’d try and work on the response for that one instead.

6. Hasn’t modern science pretty much disproved the Bible?
It’s hard to imagine anything that is farther from the truth than the idea that modern science has disproved the Bible. In fact, the science of archaeology, to name one field, has repeatedly confirmed the trustworthiness of the biblical accounts (we devote a chapter to this subject in our book, “Don’t Check Your Brains at the Door”). Archaeologist William F. Albright wrote,

The excessive skepticism shown toward the Bible by important historical schools of the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries, certain phases of which still appear periodically, has been progressively discredited. Discovery after discovery has established the accuracy of innumerable details, and has brought increased recognition to the value of the Bible as a source of history

We don’t need 18th century skepticism to tell us the Bible is full of holes. Where do we begin? The creation story perhaps, or Noah’s Flood? Shall we discuss what science has to say about the possibility of Jonah living inside a giant fish for three days, or Samson killing thousands of men with a donkey’s jaw-bone? As for the Bible’s take on history, modern archaeology has found little in the way of proof. Take the “City of David“. While Israeli archaeologists acknowledge that there is no evidence linking David to the site, they anticipate eventually finding this proof, and as far as they are concerned, there is no way to convince them otherwise. Proof has remained elusive for Israel’s archaeologists, but it hasn’t prevented anyone there from trying to use it as a political tool to bolster Israel’s claim to ancient Palestine. Does this sound like good science to you?

7. Who even knows if Jesus ever really existed?

The existence of a man named Jesus who lived in Galilee and Judea in the early part of the first century is utterly indisputable from a historical standpoint. In fact, if you ever encounter such a view from a friend or teacher, invite that person to travel with you to Israel. In the land where Jesus once lived, everyone—Christians, Jews, Muslims, atheists—consider the idea he that never existed to be laughable. Why? Because the evidence of his historicity is a daily reality there.

Is this guy for real? I don’t find the idea laughable at all, and I’m not the only one. Some of the very first Christians, the Gnostics, didn’t believe in a historical Jesus either. You don’t hear much about these early Christians since, like the Arians, they were mostly wiped out. Questioning the historicity of Jesus isn’t new; we just weren’t allowed to voice contrary opinions for a long time. To claim that everyone agrees on his historical existence is a pretty big disservice to Christian teens desperately trying to defend their bullshit, trust me.

8. Don’t you think Jesus could have been just a good teacher who didn’t intend to be worshiped as a god?

Though Christianity and Christians can be pretty unpopular these days, Jesus remains widely admired… even by many people who don’t profess to believe in him or worship him. He is revered as a “good teacher,” as a “philosopher,” but not as who he said he was, according to the historical record. C. S. Lewis famously wrote about this phenomenon:

A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic — on a level with the man who says he is a poached egg — or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God or else a madman or something worse…let us not come with any patronizing nonsense about His being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to.

Creating this kind of dichotomy can’t possibly work in your favor, guys. Any person with a logical mind not indoctrinated to your cult would immediately realize that, if given the choice between God or madman, Jesus certainly fits the description of the latter. When he curses a fig tree for failing to give him fruit, the choice seems fairly obvious. When he claims that diseases are the result of demonic possession, we recognize the words of a loon. Giving him the status of godhood only serves to prove how little Jesus knew about the real world. If he did exist, he is no more remarkable than Apollonius of Tyana, who was claimed to have performed the exact same miracles as Jesus (with the added bonus of being able to pass through walls like David Copperfield).

9. Do you really believe that Jesus literally rose from the dead?
Many theories have been put forth to try to cast doubt on the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead. All of  them are inadequate; some are even ludicrous (we devote three chapters to these theories in our book, “Don’t Check Your Brains at the Door”). In fact, the historical evidence for the resurrection is so overwhelming, historians have to become “anti-historical” in their efforts to build a case against it. As Lord Darling, a prominent English judge, once said, “No intelligent jury in the world could fail to bring in a verdict that the resurrection story is true.

Lord Darling, for any of you who gives a shit, was a minor historical figure of little importance, and little relevancy. Authority here, in any case, is not needed to contest the Resurrection of a Palestinian Jew 2000 years ago. Extraordinary claims requires extraordinary evidence, and what little there is consist of “witness” accounts written decades after his supposed death by people who never even met the guy. If our standards for evidence are so low, than should we also believe that Perseus really did kill the Medusa, and Orpheus braved the underworld to rescue his beloved?

10. How can you believe in that stuff?

The most convincing evidence for the Christian faith is not historical, textual, or archaeological; it is the testimony of a changed life. When I (Josh) set out to disprove the Christian faith, my mind met unassailable facts… but my heart met irresistible love. I met a group of Christians at Kellogg College in Battle Creek, Michigan, who exposed me for the first time to the love of God. Oh, how they loved each other. And I wanted what they had. That love paved the road of faith for me, and thus began my journey of faith. All the evidence in the world—the most powerful arguments and most convincing proofs—probably wouldn’t have gotten through to me if the transforming power of God’s love had not reached my heart through that student group and others.

Always keep in mind that the same will be true of anyone who challenges or questions your faith. Your answers can help open their hearts, but the vibrant evidence of a changed life will always be the most convincing apologetic you can offer.

This is usually where arguments with Christians end: this idea that “a changed life” is somehow proof that their faith is real. While I don’t deny that their beliefs may be genuine, it has no bearing on reality whatsoever. The speed of light in a vacuum is 299,792,458 meters per second regardless of how I feel about it, or whether my life is transformed with such information. If relying on emotion is your idea of a strong defense in face of legitimate criticism, than there’s very little I can do to convince you otherwise. Of course, I can offer you this little piece of advice: don’t expect to blow anyone away with these kinds of pathetic arguments, boys and girls.

Pope attempts to recruit German bigots

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Over the weekend, the Pope arrived in Germany on a tour designed to try and recruit Protestants and other estranged Christians who have grown tired of their religion’s increasing acceptance of homosexual marriage.

Knowing, too, the value of family and marriage, we as Christians attach great importance to defending the integrity and the uniqueness of marriage between one man and one woman from any kind of misinterpretation,” he said, according to the Associated Press. “Here the common engagement of Christians, including many Orthodox and Oriental Orthodox Christians, makes a valuable contribution to building up a society equipped for the future.”

You wouldn’t want marriage to be “misinterpreted” by allowing your fellow human beings to enjoy the same rights as everyone else, right?. This could send a dangerous message of acceptance and tolerance that the Catholic Church has vowed to combat.

A society equipped for the future – according to these assholes- is one where gays and lesbians are marginalized and clearly not worthy of the same rights as heterosexuals. The Bible tells them so, and even though they’ve chosen to ignore all the other laws that make it a sin to eat bacon or to wear clothing made of two different fabrics, the ones they focus on tend to provide theological justification for whatever ignorant bullshit they’re trying to peddle.

I find it hilarotragic (my new word for anything both tragic and hilarious) that an organization that shelters thousands of child rapists has the audacity to claim to have society’s best interest in mind. I think their long history of repression, abuse and murder severely undermines this idea. I encourage the Catholic Church to keep fighting against the civil rights of gay people; it’ll be just one more reason for people to abandon their fucking nonsense.

7 Reasons why the Wizard of Oz is the work of Satan

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Before listening to the enlightening sermon of Pastor David Grice, I thought the Wizard of Oz was a whimsical musical featuring a talented cast of actors bringing a classic tale to life. Little did I realize that it’s actually a psychotic story of a young murderer and her unwitting accomplices. Yes, the Wizard of Oz is Satanic, and with the help of David’s hilarious sermon (he reminds me of a chubbier Will Sasso), I aim to prove to you definitively that the movie “The Wizard of Oz” is in fact a secular plot to destroy the world.

#1: Dorothy is a rebellious girl
“For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft” [1st Samuel 15:23]

If there’s one thing the Bible can’t stand, it’s rebellious women. Not only is Dorothy rebellious: she often takes a leadership role, even when there are men around. She lacks discipline, she goes against the wishes of her elders, and she’s unusually curious and literate. The Good Book definitely has a lot to say about the role of women in society, and leading a murderous band of thugs (while not itself a sin) certainly isn’t one of them. Just ask Joan of Arc.

#2: Midgets not properly shunned
“Whosoever he be of thy seed in their generations that hath any blemish, let him not approach to offer the bread of his God” [Leviticus 21: 17-23]

Don’t let their little dance fool you: midgets are evil, regardless of their relative cuteness or musical ability. The Bible is quite clear on the subject of these genetic monstrosities: they are to be isolated and killed immediately. Dwarfism is not the result of a genetic anomaly, malnutrition or a host of other problems, but rather the sinister work of Satan himself.

#3. Witches notoriously NOT on fire
“A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death” [Leviticus 20:27]

While the movie does seem to portray the murder of evil witches as both moral and desirable, the Bible makes no distinction between either good or bad sorcery. All must be tortured into confession, and finally offered a chance to repent before being burned alive. We’re trying to save these women, after all!

#4. People worship some kind of Wizard instead of stoning him to death
And the soul that turneth after such as have familiar spirits, and after wizards, to go a whoring after them, I will even set my face against that soul, and will cut him off from among his people.[Leviticus 20:6]

While the “Wizard of Oz” uses technology rather than magic to trick people into worshiping him, his device – a kind of portal through which he voices the will of God and which seems to read people’s secret fears – is really just a subtle metaphor about priests being nothing more than con artists who send otherwise innocent and good people to commit murder for the sake of some esoteric reward.

#5. Oz is clearly trying to satirize heaven
“And the twelve gates were twelve pearls; every several gate was of one pearl: and the street of the city was pure gold, as it were transparent glass.” [Revelations:21-21]

God loves Gold more than most elements, and Revelations states that the streets will be paved in it. L. Frank Baum’s “yellow brick road” is intended to mock the idea that heaven should any have roads at all. The Emerald City is also clearly satirizing the “Emerald Throne” that God (who is made of Jasper Stone) is said to rest on.

#6. The cowardly lion is a mockery of Jesus
“And one of the elders saith unto me, Weep not: behold, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, hath prevailed to open the book, and to loose the seven seals thereof.”[Revelation 5:5]

The Lion (a clear representation of Jesus) has no courage, and while his appearance at first seems powerful and commanding, Toto (who represents doubting Thomas) immediately exposes him as a coward. He is also unwise; he too falls for the campy illusion of the “Wizard” just as the others do.

#7. The Wizard of Oz is a celebration of humanism
Thou shalt fear the LORD thy God; him shalt thou serve, and to him shalt thou cleave, and swear by his name. [Deuteronomy 10:20]

Dorothy’s solution for returning home -namely the clicking of her heels- represents man’s independence from God. Since the solution to her problem was “inside her all along”, Dorothy does not need the fear of the Lord to guide her actions, nor does she need “his” power to solve her problems. This totally undermines God’s ability to command (through the loving and exploratory hands of the clergy) his sinful creation.

If you can’t see the work of Satan in this film, then you’re just being ignorant, dog.

German legislators plan to boycott Pope’s speech

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When abuse allegations started popping up against the Catholic Church, Germany was one of those countries that, like Ireland, had suffered mightily at the hands of the clergy. When they opened up a hotline for victims of sexual abuse, they received 2700 calls after only 3 days. The Vatican, aware that it’s about as popular as mouth herpes, is setting off to Germany in a vain attempt to discuss how Protestants and Catholics can “work together”. While the Chancellor urged Germans to be wary of the growing “trend” of secularism, the ones with their heads still screwed on tight have decided to boycott the Pope’s visit out of protest that it violates the separation of Church and State in the country. Officials speaking on the behalf of the Vatican had this to say:

“The parliamentarians ought to consider how this will look from abroad,” Walter Brandmueller, who is German, told the mass-circulation daily Bild.

“They’ll boost the image of the ‘ugly Germans,’ which sadly still exists,” the cardinal added.

Yeah, pulling out the Nazi card isn’t the greatest idea when you were willing to forge an alliance with them (also, excommunicating Hitler would be a good start). Besides, why do they always seem shocked when some people don’t feel like going to their little parties? Recall that their current “mascot” sheltered known pedophiles from prosecution (as did his predecessor), and has done nothing to purge the organization of pederasts. What a surprise that no one wants to show them any support.

Here’s the core problem folks: the Catholic Church, more than any other religious organization, seems to have a serious pedophile problem within their ranks. Because of their rather disturbed idea of celibacy and sexual repression, Catholic priests don’t properly develop their sexual maturity, often staying in a child-like state. Obviously it’s not the sole reason the Church has such an infestation, since their strict rules about secrecy is an attractive options for pederasts hoping to avoid jail time. And while the Vatican may deny these allegations, you don’t see any other organization going to the same lengths they do to protect child rapists; withholding evidence, paying off families to stay quiet and moving around offending priests when accusations arise is not the kind of behavior we would tolerate from ANY other private or public institutions. Yet when these same assholes make a trip to a foreign country and get the cold shoulder, they act surprised that not everyone welcomes them with open arms.  The funny thing about people is that they tend to get upset when you start fucking their kids. Go figure!

Can we just jail these fuckers and call it a day already?