Conservative pizza mogul builds new Eden

I don’t spend a lot of time wondering where my money goes when I buy food. I figure it’s going to the employees, the owner of the franchise, and whatever is left goes to some obscure CEO locked up in an office, counting his money. I always figured these guys were like Scrooge; they made you work in the cold, giving you as little time off to spend with your invalid son as possible. It never occurred to me some of these guys might actually hold religious views that seriously jeopardized the liberties of others. Thomas Monaghan, founder of Dominoes Pizza™, has built a rather large Catholic town in Florida called Ave Maria. After purchasing precious swamp land, he decided to create a new Eden, where fresh faced young Christians can witness to one other, while they deny their fellow citizens birth control, and the ability to have safe abortions. He didn’t go halfway into this venture; Monaghan poured his billion dollar fortune into building his Catholic haven, selling his business to afford this dream.

When 27 million dollar creation museums are springing up, you know fundamentalists have access to some serious cash, but Monaghan goes far beyond the hopes and dreams of exclusionary pious folks. He’s not the only business owner with deep pockets who is pushing an agenda; Gary Heavin, the founder and CEO of Curves™, donates a considerable amount of his earnings to pro-life organizations. Although the chain itself is not involved, its growing popularity has no doubt allowed a substantial increase in his donations.

Although I do believe people should be allowed to spend their money as they see fit (so long as no one is hurt), I nevertheless feel it is my duty not to support any company or institution I feel is doing people a disservice. Monaghan’s University is just another fledgling religious lapdog, ready to churn out countless generations of conservatively minded individuals who oppose women’s right to choose, gay marriage, or not generally believing in a bearded, andro-centric god. Although he no longer owns Dominoes, it might prompt me to be a bit more careful where I choose to purchase.

Pope backs Intelligent Design

If you want any solid proof that a Pope is as flawed, ignorant, and uneducated as the rest of us, look no further than Benedict XVI. When he isn’t busy making controversial statements about Islam, he likes to take a breather by trying to dismantle evolution by means of Natural Selection by perpetually pointing at dusty old tomes. His latest blunder comes care of an off collar remark asking: “[h]ow many of these people are there today? These people, fooled by atheism, believe and try to demonstrate that it’s scientific to think everything is free of direction and order.“

Ratzinger is not a complete fool; although he lacks any training and understanding of evolution, he knows enough to realize it seriously undermines the role of his creator God, which therefore puts his cushy job in jeopardy.

For the Vatican, it’s a departure from John Paul II comments claiming evolution was more than a theory, and was not incompatible with Christianity. In July, Austrian Cardinal Christoph Schoenborn said that John Paul’s statements were ‘vague and unimportant’, and himself backed the notion a designer must have been responsible for the complexity of the universe.

I don’t know about you, but I’m personally sick and tired of priests, cardinals and popes (the vast majority of them having no scientific training whatsoever) telling every scientist that they are wrong about the natural world. These are the same men who devote their entire lives to the study of the supernatural, which by definition can never be measured, or even properly understood. Never mind the fact that two Popes, who are supposed to be the infallible avatars of God, never seem to agree on anything; the simple fact is their authority extends no further than their own secluded belief structure. The very act of trying to extend their sophisticated form of fantasizing to the natural world only demonstrates their own hubris. These people may have power and influence, but if those in power still determined the truth, we would never have escaped the hell of the Dark Ages.

Benedict XVI should go back to the one activity that does absolutely no harm: praying. Since it’s a well demonstrated fact that prayer has no effect whatsoever, at least he can stop meddling in affairs which don’t concern him. If someone wants to know how many angels, fairies, or dragons can fit on the end of a pin, then they can give him a call. Otherwise, for any questions concerning the real world, don’t have him on your speed dial.

Christian rationalist points blaming finger at atheists

Let’s face it; we’re used to being generally despised; it’s so unsurprising, in fact, that when I fell upon this site, www.christianfaithandreason.com, I practically glossed over the familiar rhetoric of atheists are deluded and wrong. Had I done so, I would have missed the opportunity to read an article by the obscure author of Letters to a Christian Nation: Counterpoint. Although the title may sound like a cheesy B movie, the meat of the tome is that atheists are doing the world (specifically the Christian one) a giant disservice by bashing religion.

What could be wrong with a healthy skeptical attitude towards religion, you say? Well, how about Europe’s disastrous population problem? With the advent of modern contraception, nonreligious folks are having fewer and fewer babies, while Muslims, not bound by enlightened attitudes regarding population control, breed like rabbits. Slowly but surely, he argues, Western society will inevitably breed itself into the minority, allowing the dangerously backward ideas of Islam to permeate the world.

Not to say Dr. Metcalf is wrong about the dwindling populations of westerners (i.e., white people), or even his statistics on the growing Muslim population in Europe. My big question here is this: What does this have to do with atheism? Well, since the title of his article is Atheist Diversionary Tactics, one can only assume he blames the lack of religiosity for this frightening trend. You see, in his world, a population explosion of westerners (people who generally share his skin color and outlook on monogamy) would mean a good thing. Never mind the notion that the Earth couldn’t handle it; this is a war of ideologies. And if there are more Muslim soldiers than Christian ones, their particular mythology might not survive.
I feel compelled to remind Dr. Metcalf that atheists are opposed to every fantasy prone religion, and for us, color isn’t the issue here. The general attack on Christianity in the US is not a product of atheists ganging up on them for no reason; it is because the growing influence and power of fundamentalists who believe their Holy book should teach science and dictates laws. Unlike Metcalf, we’re not comfortable with that idea.

What seemed deliciously ironic was that one individual commented succinctly over Mr. Metcalf’s decidedly irrelevant rant concerning both atheists and Muslims in general. He stated:

[A]ny democractic [sic] republic which includes Muslims must include them as citizens if it is to representative. This involves a certain level of cultural exchange and understanding, which enable all people to contribute to civil society. This level of understanding is important whether one is Christian, Muslim, or Atheist– we face many crises as a species, and these divisions do not serve us well in the search for answers. Mr. Metcalf’s ‘Us vs. Them’ polemic rings hollow on this and another level. He stands zero chance of communicating with the people he so viciously attacks. So what’s the point?

Couldn’t have put it better myself!

The Mickey incident, Part 2

Some of you may recall a story I featured a few weeks ago about a children’s television show starring a high pitched voiced Mickey Mouse rip-off, who encouraged children to fight Israel. Amid international pressure, the producers finally decided to drop the character, but not before adding their own little psychotic twist by martyring him.

We’re all aware that there are organized indoctrination campaigns all across the Middle East designed to create generations of suicide bombers. To succeed, they rely on two important tactics in their efforts to turn human beings into walking bombs: (1) they target the weak, young, vulnerable, and uneducated to do their bidding, and (2) they rely on the mechanism of blind faith as a tool for mindless obedience. What better targets than children, since they have all the necessary requirement?

Violent rhetoric doesn’t rely on subtlety to be effective. In the case of Farfour, the creepy mascot of religious intolerance, his final skit involved an Israeli soldier beating him to death while attempting to usurp him from his land. His teenage co-host, a young woman whose soft smiling face belied a cold and calculating grin, explained how Farfour’s demise was the result of his defending Palestine, a clear message that a peaceful compromise in Israel was not on the mouse’s mind.

Luckily, not everyone in Palestine was content with the show’s violent and malicious message. Many segments of the population are peaceful individuals, desperate for a compromise that would allow them to live in harmony and peace with their neighbors. It’s difficult to imagine, however, how such a thing is possible when characters like Farfour are given access to young and impressionable minds. The future of both Palestine and Israel will forever be compromised so long as zealots are allowed to incense children to violence and murder. I can only hope that unlike his North American counterpart, he will fade into obscurity, a forgotten memory of a desperate and turbulent time.

God works in mysterious ways, especially at the lumber yard

Actors who play the title role of God have the sweetest roles. First, they always seem wise, paternal, all-knowing, and even a little smug. Secondly, they have the soft, epic choir singing quietly in the background. And finally, just when you think this God character is a real bastard, his infinite wisdom is proven, and the audience leaves home satisfied with the performance. And really, who could resist the one line every actor practices in the mirror each night: “Who am I? Well, I’m God, of course!”

I’m not in the business of providing film reviews, but considering the nature of my site, I couldn’t help but throw, if temporarily, my hat in the ring in the case of Evan Almighty, the sequel to Jim Carrey’s biggest box office hit ever. Jim’s always been smart about second tier movies that hang on the strength of their name sake predecessors by steering clear of them. Although he isn’t the comedian he used to be, I have to give him credit for avoiding this lemon.

It’s not to say the movie is bad, but it certainly isn’t good, or even as insightful as it hopes. The movie has heavy environmentalist overtones, and though you may be tempted into congratulating the valiant effort to create some sense of awareness for Mother Nature, in truth it feels like a grade 3 class on environmentalism. There’s a painfully awkward scene, for example, involving a carpenter recommending to Evan, proud new owner of his own McMansion, to do his countertop in wood cut down so recently from the rainforest you can taste the tears.

Now, as God commands Evan to build him an ark in preparation for an incoming flood, my thoughts turned instantly to a possible lesson in global warming. The entire movie, you expect some news of a massive piece of polar icecap melting being ultimately responsible for the new Genesis of mankind. No such luck, unfortunately. The producers of the movie knew they were in for a tough sell if they went down that storyline arc (pun intended). The last thing conservative, God-fearing ticket holders want to hear about is the depressing idea that we’re slowly melting the icecaps. So a compromise is created: the big disaster is actually the result of over development and corporate greed (not to mention poor craftsmanship), not CO2 emissions.

Although there have been positive reviews from some critics praising the films pro-environment stand, there is something ultimately hollow about the way it’s done. In the end scene, as the family enjoys a picnic and some sandwiches, I couldn’t help but notice the plastic bag the family was using to carry them in, each one enjoying the summer air in their new, machine washed clothing. Perhaps it’s only a subtle demonstration of how the American mythos of prosperity and happiness is the antithesis to living a sustainable existence. Perhaps it’s also because I felt the real point of the Noah’s Ark story was completely whitewashed. I’m no fan of the Bible, but I’m aware of the very important message of redemption and rebirth present in the moral homily. I am also aware that although the God of the Old Testament is no sweetheart, the real bad guy isn’t him; it’s the rest of us for squandering the precious gift of life.

As the bad guy is exposed for his sins in the movie, no doubt dragged away satisfyingly by some local police officer, there’s a weird feeling that they may be arresting the wrong person. After all, no one else is held accountable for the fact the developed land was bought, and later outfitted with monstrously huge and polluting homes, each one with a gas guzzling car parked in the driveway. Is it so hard to believe perhaps other people rather than Evan needed to be taught a lesson about our impact on the environment, Mr. God?

Throughout the movie, I half expected a beautiful speech delivered from the lips of Morgan Freeman about the need for a stewardship with nature. Instead I got a trite lesson of being kind to my family, and to those around me. Well God, does love fix a hole in the ozone layer, or prevent the icecaps from melting? I have an idea: how about giving me something practical, like the 2 hours of my life I lost watching this movie?

Couple finds angel in tree rings

You look long and hard, squint your eyes to the point of straining them, and finally, as your eyeballs cry for mercy, the giant blotch starts looking like an angel. No, this isn’t a Rorschach inkblot test, although in retrospect, it might as well be. Instead, this is a couple in Georgetown, Illinois who claim to have cut down a tree with an angel face in it.

Sherri and Jerry Conklin, whose home was threatened by an old oak tree, cut down the soft maple to avoid further property damage. When they were finished, they discovered that one of the wood grains displayed the image of an angel. Their local newspaper, suffering from a lack of any pertinent news, thought it would be a good idea to feature a credulous couple who believe the image of the cherub appeared only after the tree had been cut down.

Now, I don’t want to be a buzzkill, but when I looked at the image, I thought I recognized one of the helmets from the Lord of the Rings movie (the fancy elven ones). Of course, Mrs. Conklin and I share have one thing in common; we are both individuals with active imaginations who see patterns in a seemingly innocuous blotch of stained wood; in fact, most normal human beings do. It’s called pareidolia, which is a physiological phenomenon whereby a vague visual stimulus triggers the brain to interpret a particular pattern or recognizable image.

This would all be fairly jovial and innocent if we could all laugh a little, and remember that the significance of such a find is no more impressive than looking up at the sky and seeing a cloud that looks like a teddy bear. The faithful droves, however, regard these kinds of finds as proof positive that their particular deity exists, and rationality, free inquiry, and objectivity fly out the window. It is in these instances we should remind ourselves there is always a powerful need to rationalize our beliefs, no matter how illogical they might be. By claiming to see angelic messages in tree trunks, grilled cheese sandwiches, and plate glass windows, we assign a pattern to nature that does not exist, and further our own ignorance. We should instead come to realize that it isn’t the outside world who’s trying to send us a message, but the internal one. Speaking of which, maybe I’ll pop in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy.

Is atheism a religion?

As a writer, the appeal of discussing atheism stems largely from the fact that although its definition may be simple, the philosophies surrounding it are not. There are so many different responses to atheism that some have begun to call it a religion. But is this true? Is atheism a religion, and if not, does it emulate any of the elements of it? As I will show in this article, the answer to that question not only makes us curious about the future implications of the growing trend of atheism, it also demands our attention about what could potentially be the next major movement in Western society.

What is a Religion?

To answer that question, we must examine the long history of religion to reveal its purpose, which will in turn reveal its structure. Although no definite number exists for the age of religion, anthropologists are convinced that crude animistic sects were a hallmark of life for our ancient ancestors as far back as the emergence of Homo sapiens (there is even evidence our evolutionary cousins, Neanderthals, had their own form of religion as well). Our ancestors were not stupid; they possessed the same raw mental power we do, but were ignorant of the natural laws that governed their environment. They faced the often brutal torment of nature, and life was certainly never easy. When confronted with the overwhelming power of nature, our ancestors turned to creative myths to explain why droughts, famine, storms, and death occurred. As they were passed down orally from generation to generation, the stories became more complex, and these complexities led to elaborate cosmogonies, and of man’s place in the universe.

Religion began to take a more active role in the stability of societies during the Agrarian Revolution roughly 10,000 years ago, due mainly to the production of food which allowed greater numbers of individuals to live together in close proximity. In small hunter-gatherer bands, the groups would typically be small enough to allow conflicts to be regulated by the collective itself, so cheaters and opportunists would be caught relatively quickly, and punished accordingly. In larger groupings, however, the collective was often unable to monitor and punish uncooperative individuals, and so an authoritative system was needed to regulate behavior and establish concrete laws that could be agreed upon. Since religions were responsible for passing on important traditions and information, so too could it create morality myths for the purpose of guiding and regulating human behavior.

Of course, I make it sound as though this process was thoroughly thought out on the part of the sects themselves. This evolution was far more organic than directed; I use the word evolution specifically because of the fact religion was shaped by the selective pressures of the rapidly escalating demand for order and structure as changes began to affect human societies (rapidly when compared to the genetic process of evolution, obviously). As such, the stability of early societies became dependant, in large part, to the stability of the religions themselves, which began to play an increasingly important role in the functioning of society.

Religion was obviously not the only system devised to institutionalize laws, although it probably was the first real stable system to do so. Their powerful influence and apparent divine authority did much to cement religion’s position as arbiter. Even in societies where more complex systems needed to be created, such as states, nations, and eventually empires, many of the mechanisms of authority relied heavily on concepts first devised by religions. In any ancient (and even today in more recent) societies, the collusion of religion and government serves as mutually reinforcing institutions. This arrangement is due to governments needing cooperation from the faithful droves who are heavily dictated to and mandated by religion, while sectarian institutions rely on the ruling government to protect them against other competing faiths. In early societies, religions played a direct or joint role in mandating morality and laws, and secularism is only a very recent trend in the history of human governance.

As with any powerful and highly influential institution, religion has known its fair share of abuses. I hardly need mention the atrocities of the Crusades or the Inquisition, nor do I need to remind the reader that sectarian conflicts are still a part of our daily lives. The Founding Fathers of America understood the dangers in any institution that holds too much power, and devised a system of intricate checks and balances to allow a self correcting process to occur. Religions lack these balances, and are structured in such a way that a very limited number of individuals command an unimaginable level of power and influence. This, coupled with imperialistic tendencies of various faiths aimed at becoming the only religion on earth creates often volatile situations.

When most people think about religion, anyone not affiliated with any sect in particular usually abhors the very notion of these institutions precisely because of the long history of both repression and terror of a large number of religions. Many feel that anything which becomes institutionalized is therefore inherently opposed to human freedom and self-determination, at least when it comes to religious traditions. Obviously, not every religion at any given time is necessarily repressive and controlling, just as every government may not inherently be either. It depends largely on how the institution is created and managed, and on what foundations it lies. Religions like Christianity, Islam, and Judaism are old religions, and many of their tenents no longer match the social mores of contemporary society. Also, the historic structure of religions like Christianity have been mostly responsible for the atrocities committed in their name, since they have relied on the executive control of a privileged few individuals, none of which were immune from the lust for power and control.

All of the major three great monotheistic religions are equally divisive in nature, since their core ideologies tell them they alone possess the truth of God, making any others, by default, wrong. And if history has taught us anything, it’s that many faiths seem to regard others with violent contempt, if not outright hostility. That does not mean it is impossible for various faiths to get along with one another. History is peppered with civilizations that tolerated other faiths, but this tolerance often quickly devolves into violent assaults on tiny religious minorities. What allowed religious dialog was not the structures of the institutions themselves, but rather respect for the rule of law in a different and more powerful institution: government.

Apart from religions being institutions responsible for the codification and sometimes enforcement of morality and law, religions obviously deal with another important element of the human experience: spirituality. This usually involves interpreting the complex and often confusing events and emotions we experience, since they can be overwhelming. But religion is not unique in this regard; philosophy in particular also performs this role, attempting to make inferences about the human experience. It attempts to answer the same questions religion does, but not necessarily by envoking the concept of a creator or god.

So far, we’ve covered the three main components of religion; in explaining processes in the natural world, in creating stability by codifying laws and morality, and in addressing the spiritual concern of individual humans. Although religion has deep roots in all three aspects, it has become obvious over the past few hundred years since the beginning of The Enlightenment that many of the traditional roles of religion are not necessary to the functioning of society. Secular countries have followed suit in eliminating the structures of religious power from the political arena, and laws are no longer modeled on the rather unsophisticated edicts of religious texts. In civilized society, we no longer consider adultery to be a capital offence, not because we are less moral, but because we recognize the finality of such a law does not have anyone’s best interest in mind. We have begun to accept that rules have exceptions, and there should be various degrees of punishment for the specific circumstances of any crime.

The increased marginality of religion has not escaped its biggest supporters, and it has taken considerable effort to wrest these powers away from them. In my home province of Quebec, until the Quiet Revolution of the 60s, the church still dominated the instruction of children, and had deep political influence. In the US, creationists continue their assault on science, refusing to admit the cosmogony of their sacred text is only a myth, and insisting it represents objective reality. But such groups, rather than using the strength of evidence (of which they have none), rely on our fears that society will be doomed without them.

We have begun to demonstrate that the first two purposes of religion can be handled without them, often with far better results. This leads us to conclude, in modern society, that the purpose of religion is dealing with the spiritual component of life. This now leads us to reconsider the original question of this article: whether or not atheism is a religion.

Although it may be said the lack of belief in God eliminates the need for any spirituality, I would argue for many atheists, the opposite is true. The realization there is no higher power and no special purpose to human life, forces us to begin to consider instead what purpose our existence can have, rather than religion’s assertion that our aspirations have already been predetermined. The understanding there is nothing inherently special about our solar system, which is one of many hundreds of billions in this galaxy alone, itself one of billions, is a deep and awesome insight. How can a person not be moved when looking up at the night sky, contemplating that the stars they look upon are all ghostly images of the past ( since light has a finite speed, and because it sometimes takes millions or even billions of years to reach us, the stars we see in the sky may well have extinguished themselves long ago)?

Similarly, atheism forces us to consider morality on a far wider scale. If there is no final arbiter, and if each one of us is accountable to no supreme authority, it raises the stakes about how we manage our laws and ethics. It encourages us to consider the broad implications of our laws, and how they affect other human beings.

If spirituality is also not the exclusive realm of religion, just what is left? For starters, religions have traditions, as well as institutions which teach and pass them on to younger generations. I may know for a fact that transubstantiation (the literal changing of wine into blood) does not really occur during religious masse, but I cannot deny that the tradition is preserved and passed on by Catholics, anymore than I can deny the reality of the tradition of circumcision in Judaism (even though I may find the practice abhorrent).

Are Atheists Dogmatic?

The accusation of atheism being a religion from the faithful seems to me to be a deep and strange paradox. They claim atheists have their own dogma, and a person needs a great deal of faith NOT to believe. Even if that were true, which it is not, it would certainly appear strange for the religious to consider this a flaw. After all, these are the same people that profess an undying need for faith.

There are undoubtedly certain individuals who hold dogmatic ideas, regardless of their religiosity or not. But in general, dogmatism is the specialty of religious institutions; not atheism. A person may reject the notion of a God without needing to make any leap of faith. Any intelligent religious person recognizes the fact they believe in God despite any evidence, or sometimes in contradiction to evidence. Therefore, the position that God is a human construct is not a statement of faith: it is precisely the opposite.

Currently, I would deny the status of religion to atheism, even though I personally lament the lack of such institutions. For all the harm we may associate with them, religious institutions still perform a valuable function in society. For many African Americans, the only institutions who have not let them down in 400 years have been their own religious traditions. The community support they receive as a direct result of their belief is a source of obvious strength, one that atheism does not yet possess. Yet, despite the fact that atheists find the idea of an institutionalized movement repugnant, the fact remains it is not the institution itself which is wrong; rather it is the design of the structure itself. What good can come from institutionalizing atheism? A great deal perhaps.

It is true that in times of crisis, we feel compelled to fall back on those systems of belief with the deepest roots, and religion certainly has a long history. This is the reason many believe the idea that there are no atheists in foxholes. What they may fail to realize is that the same impulse to fall back on various roots does not always mean individuals will adopt a religious stance. We also have a long history of skepticism, and mistrust in the abuses of power. If the traditions of science, skepticism, and free thought are to survive any assault, its roots must be as deep as any religion. Individuals will need to feel the same sense of community and support from atheism as they do in their respective faiths. How else can we hope for individuals to remove their dependence on superstition to provide comfort and familiarity?

Is atheism a religion? No, it quite obviously is not. But we must understand the question is really: can atheism provide the same comfort and support that religion does? In its present form, it may not be able to do so. A serious crisis might push us more towards religious fundamentalism, which is something that is currently happening in the most desperate and troubled societies. If atheism is to both survive and thrive, it will require the adoption of many of the aspects of religion, tailored in a new way that avoids the dangerous temptation of centralizing power and influence into the hands of the few. Are we capable of such wisdom? Only time will tell.

Archie the bible thumper

I remember Archie comics fondly as a kid. Although the storylines were always predictable and innocuous, I had a deep appreciation for such familiarity. Looking back, however, I couldn’t help but notice that the quaint vision of life in America was a product of the pining for simpler times, when teenagers worried about who they would take to the big dance, and drug, violence, and sex was never an issue. This picture, of course, is simply a fantasy. Still, it was a wholesome alternative to the sometimes overly violent and complicated works of other comic books, like Spiderman or X-Men.

What I never realized however, was in the 1970s and 80s, the characters were featured in a number of fundamentalist Christian books under the publication of Spire Christian Comics. The strict doctrine of Christianity was encouraged, with the troop involved in issues surrounding evolution, drug addiction, and even a little anti-establishmentarianism (they didn’t like hippies too much, it would seem).

Although tame compared to the far more sophisticated methodology of indoctrination the religious right is employing, I’ve never been comfortable with cultural icons presenting their own personal beliefs as undeniable facts to their young and impressionable audience. In the comics, the faithless always appear morally bent, while the sheen of the Archie characters come off as annoyingly ‘holier-than-thou’. In one of the comics, Archie even opens up a Christian bookstore in a western themed scenario, so students at the local schools will be delivered from the evils of evolution. To quote Betty: “When they took the Bible out of school, more and more problems came in” [emphasis theirs]. Of course, such a thing is only a tragedy to those who maintain a strict adherence to the cosmogony of the Bible, rather than the rigorous theories of science.

If you don’t feel annoyed, try to imagine for a moment that instead of telling children about the love Jesus has for them, Archie and friends were informing their loyal readers that Mohammed was the last prophet of God, and praising the joy of the Qur’an.

It’s rather convenient that these comics have faded into obscurity, thereby failing to taint the image of the poster-boy for Americana, Mr. Archie Andrews. On a side note, this isn’t the first time the characters have faced a bit of controversy. In 2003, a small theatre production was issued a cease and desist order for their satirical play involving the Riverdale gang. The play was to have Archie coming out as gay. The franchise felt such a play would tarnish the wholesome image of their title character. It’s strange how they never opposed the idea of Archie Andrews the ‘Creationist Bible Thumper’…Strange indeed.

The Secret to happiness isn’t thinking, apparently

You might not be aware of this, but there are apparently only three things you need to do to make your life better and more prosperous; first ask the universe, then align yourself to it, and finally, reap the rewards of your materialistic fantasizing. If this sounds familiar, that’s because it’s not unlike what you did as a child, waiting for Santa Claus to bring you your presents.

If you’re wondering what I am talking about, then allow me to explain; in late 2006, a DVD entitled The Secret was released and received worldwide attention, with celebrities such as Oprah advertising its benefits. Eventually a book was written (which seems oddly backwards in the world of self-help). Both sold themselves on the premise that everything a person wants and desires is the result of what one ‘projects’ with their thoughts. Although this may seem like a harmless fantasy, the philosophies it endorses nevertheless encourages people’s greed, materialism, and selfishness, all under the banner of ‘self-help’.

The video starts off seemingly harmless enough; the producer explaining that she was caught in a vicious cycle of desperation at the loss of a family member and of being severely overworked. Then, by some miracle, she was told of a wonderful and powerful secret, one that had been known about for thousands of years, but was apparently suppressed. What is this wonderful secret? That the power of wishful thinking can give a person everything they dream.

As I sat, hands firmly gripping my couch pillows, fighting back my intense frustration from watching, I desperately hoped the explanation for this supposed phenomenon would be the trite but popular idea that by thinking positively, one can affect positive changes in their life. Of course, this is no secret, and the movie would be over quite quickly had they wisely asserted such a proposition. Instead, we are introduced to something called ‘The Law of Attraction’. This supposed ‘law’ is a popular New Age belief that boldly claims the prominent thoughts of people manifest themselves in physical reality. Through the dubious rhetoric of ‘the resonance of energetic vibrations’, the Secret reveals that the thoughts of people emit a frequency that causes a direct reaction from the universe.

The Secret reveals objects are manifested as we begin to fantasize about them. The harder we wish for them, the more likely we are to get them, since the universe is a giant catalog of goods (in fact, one guy literally called it ‘the catalog of the universe’) just waiting to be tapped. One just has to be ready to ask in the proper way to start reaping the benefits of such an eager-beaver cosmos.

How can you begin to experience the joys of unbridled consumerism you ask? Well, rather than think about an object in words (which this silly universe could never understand), you must break it down to a more basic, emotional context. So what if this becomes a rather obvious technique to discourage thought in favor of primal greed? I needs to get paid, dammit!

If this sounds alarmingly materialistic (in fact, I can’t tell you how many times the words prosperity, money, and wealth are used), the implications of such an idea extend far beyond the simple conspicuous consumption it so carelessly flaunts. If the universe gives us what we think about, why do people suffer, get hurt, or face hard times? In other words, if the Cosmos is so keen on pleasing us, and showering us with goods, why is life so crappy for almost everyone?

Because thoughts have such a powerful impact on physical reality, we apparently often fall victim to tragedy by merit of simply thinking about it. Our minds become ultimate betrayers, and as the gurus of the video assert, the real reason bad things happen is really all of our fault. No one is a victim; they are merely inviting pain and misery as a result of their thoughts. Never mind the couple who gets robbed, or the young woman next door who gets assaulted and raped; they all had it coming, since they were apparently unaware their own feelings had invited such terror in their lives.

Yes, it must be the victim who’s to blame! After all, when my dog was run over when I was a child, surely it was because I was putting out bad vibes to the universe, and not because my neighbor had an obsession with skidoos. Come to think of it, he was poor, and yet always seemed to buy a new snowmobile every year, usually accidentally killing a pet of mine once every decade or so. He surely must have known the Secret: he kept wishing for a check to come through the mail, and low and behold, one would appear once a month, despite his perpetual unemployment.

Like an explosion in an ammunitions depot, the video continued firing aimlessly in all directions, vomiting every objectionable ideology, each time trying to top itself in its inanity. Worried about war? Forget about protesting stupid! By doing such a thing, you only greatly increase the chance of wars breaking out, since the universe is unable to differentiate between a desire and a fear. Think you might have cancer, or you’re paralyzed from the waist down? Ignore stem cell research; having happy thoughts and not thinking about it will make those malignant blues go away!

With everyone wishing for material goods in the world, is it possible the Earth’s resources might run out? Certainly, as an environmentalist, I worry about such things. Luckily we are told by these wise gurus that we have all been deceived; there are plenty enough goods to go around. All of those scientists who say we would need three planet Earths to accommodate the needs of 6 billion people living the American dream haven’t been wishfully thinking enough. Come to think about it, maybe all their worrying is what’s causing Global Warming. We need to start ignoring this problem fast, or else we’ll start making it worse!

The lack of real content, or evidence, or research made the video not only an exercise in patience, but I seriously began to wonder if there was perhaps an insidious reason for its manufacture. After all, the DVD seemed to suggest powerful men had tried to keep the Secret from regular folks to keep them subservient. But the Secret so obviously discouraged free thought and intellectual protest that I began to imagine, like every get-rich-quick scheme and self-help manual, the real trick is to distract someone with a carrot while you steal their car. There are undoubtedly many rich and powerful individuals who achieved that power through coercive means, and it is in their best interest to continue making us believe the reasons we continue to be poor is our own fault, rather than theirs.

Perhaps that’s the real secret: that it’s always the person who claims to know the secret to success who most likely won’t share the right one, or has no real interest in sharing anything at all. More plausible is his intention to use your own greed against you. In that way, many of us really are victims of ourselves. Of course, we can always fight the temptation to listen to easy answers, and admit to each other that we can only try to live our lives the best way we can; and though we dream, realize the universe isn’t likely to buy you a new house.

Intelligent Design tries to make a comeback

Just when you were hoping Intelligent Design had gone the way of the Dodo bird, a small town school board always seems to become mired in the controversy. This time, it’s the Chesterfield County School District in Virginia, which, in its school memoranda, has decided that it wants students to ‘expand their knowledge through research, to debate the concepts as presented, and to develop their creative and independent thinking skills’. In other words, they want to teach the ‘science’ of Intelligent Design alongside Evolution.

Despite the decisive rulings against the teaching of ‘scientific creationism’, it seems the ID camp has not given up on trying to make everyone believe their fantasy is tantamount to a scientific revolution. In fairness to the staff at Chesterfield, they may not be aware of just how thoroughly debunked and debased the theory has been ever since December 2005, when the Dover, Pennsylvania School Board lost its attempt to sell Intelligent Design as a secular alternative to Evolution.

The Dover Ruling

In October of 2004, in Dover Pennsylvania, the school board decided to include a disclaimer in its biology textbooks, saying that evolution was a ‘theory’ and not fact, and alternative explanations for the origins of life existed, primarily in a book entitled Of Pandas and People. A group of parents, angry at this development, decided to initiate a lawsuit, which resulted in a lengthy but decisive trial which would definitively answer whether or not ID should be allowed in public schools.

U.S. District Judge John E. Jones (who was an admitted staunch conservative) found ID violated the Constitutional separation of Church and State, and unfairly singled out evolution and misrepresented its scientific standing. He also agreed ID was quite obviously religious in nature. Although the case brought in many of Intelligent Design’s ‘expert’ witnesses, the prosecution showed decisively that ID presented no scientific argument on its own; instead, ID relied on the false premise that if any aspect of Evolution faltered, it would inherently mean ID was true. This is nothing more than a false choice, since ID presents no real alternative explanations other than the classic ‘God in the Gaps’ arguments.

To prove that ID was nothing more than dressed up creationism, the prosecution also showed that the board members had been advised by The Discovery Institute, an ultra conservative ‘think-tank’whose primary mission is the spread of Creationism in American public schools, and as their website puts it: ‘belief in God-given reason and the permanency of human nature’. The prosecution also showed that both sides considered the issue to be a religious one, and over 80% of the parents who wrote in to the school, whether for or against the disclaimer, expressed their opinions among religious lines.

Finally, it obliterated the ID camp by cross-examining the expert witnesses of scientific creationism by proving not only that each of star witnesses was devoutly religious, but also that their theories on the invalidity of Evolution was not based on scientific observation, but rather on strictly religious observance.

What does this mean for Chesterfield?

The decisive ruling has done much in the elimination of Intelligent Design from public schools, and the strange decision of the Chesterfield to potentially introduce ID theories in the classroom demonstrates their lack of understanding of both evolution, and of past rulings concerning Intelligent Design. Although their website maintains that they are committed to upholding the Constitution, their press release demonstrates their total lack of understanding of these two issues:

“We have received much interest and concern from our citizens relating to the theory of evolution as taught in our science classes. It is the School Board’s belief that this topic, along with all other topics that raise differences of thought and opinion, should receive the thorough and unrestricted study as we have just articulated. Accordingly, we direct our superintendent to charge those of our professionals who support curriculum development and implementation with the responsibility to investigate and develop processes that encompass a comprehensive approach to the teaching and learning of these topics.”

What they mean by ‘much interest’ relating to the theory of evolution (and they love to misuse the word theory, don’t they?) is that religious parents are obviously averse to the idea of their kids being taught that human beings descended from a primate ancestor. It’s also doubtful their superintendent would have the scientific gumption to properly ‘investigate and develop processes that encompass a comprehensive approach to the teaching and learning of these topics’. It is more likely they would not present the evidence in a fair manner, and take the opportunity to teach children the laughable idea that species were spontaneously created by some supernatural force.

Their notion that self-directed learning occurs only when alternative views are explored and discussed implies that Intelligent Design is somehow a valid scientific opinion, which it quite obviously is not. It’s just another example of the religious right attempting to usurp the findings and works of science in favor of their mythological world view. If Chesterfield continues to push the issue, they may quickly find themselves not only embarrassed at their own backwardness, but may also face the hefty cost of legal action brought on by concerned parents.

Sex scandal at Creation Museum

So, the Creation Museum, still so new to the world, is already getting embroiled in a sex scandal. An actor who appeared as Adam in a video the museum uses to help tell their story of how the universe was created, also had a little risqué website on the side. The site shows some rather graphic photos and promotes a ‘free love’ attitude. The horror. This, of course, has gotten the officials at the Museum all hot and bothered, and not in a way their wives will appreciate. They’ve announced an investigation and have noted on their website that the actor’s actions do not match the morals or values they wish to communicate with the museum. They’ve also taken down the video.

Certainly, the museum has every right to be a little shocked at the behaviour of the actor. They have the right to openly criticize the man and the website he appears on. What doesn’t make sense is why they took down the video. Mr. Linden didn’t promote or make mention of the site in it. Indeed, he is a professional actor who played the role he was offered. The actor freely admits that while he isn’t Adam off-screen, that has nothing to do with how he performs in the video itself.

So what is the problem for the Museum? It seems they cannot fathom the idea the man they hired to play Adam was not of the highest moral caliber. What’s more, they’ve made issues of something that has nothing to do with the Museum itself or Creationism in general (from their so-called scientific perspective). What the actor did outside of his performance in the video is really not the concern of the Museum or their leadership. What they are doing is publicly questioning his morals and values, deeming them less than satisfactory for public decency. That is unfair and hypocritical. He has done nothing wrong.

A quick visit to Eric Linden’s site (aka Adam), reveals that rather than being upset by the museum’s decision, he accuses left wing pressure groups of trying to shut down the Creation Museum by ‘outing’ him. He claims “people such as Julie Carr Smyth, feel it’s necessary to attack the Creation Museum in any way possible. Why? Maybe because they are right? I was hired as a actor, not a spokesperson!”

The Museum operators have created a scandal where none existed. That such a tenuous link between a small website and the museum has been blown up into such a controversy is rather shameful. The man’s actions outside of his performance in the video have done nothing to harm the museum. The museum and its operators should be ashamed for casting public scrutiny on a man who has done nothing aside from behaving and acting how he wished, which is the right of everyone.

Mentally deranged man lunges at Popemobile

I always thought any man who wears a pink T-shirt must undoubtedly be a little crazy. This belief was confirmed as I read a story concerning a 24 year old man, dressed in the flashy color, who attempted to lunge at the Popemobile. He managed to hang on for several seconds before being wrestled to the ground. Police say the man was mentally disturbed, and rather than trying to hurt Pope Benedict XVI, he merely wanted to draw attention to himself.

Well, duh! He was wearing a pink T-shirt for god’s sake; what other proof do you need? Equally surprising about this story was that the man was able to get so close to the Pope, especially considering security has tightened significantly since the attack of 9/11. Usually, the Pope travels in a vehicle with bullet proof glass, a measure taken after the attempted assassination of John Paul II in 1981. I suppose Vatican officials don’t have enough confidence in the divine to expect God to provide his own form of security to his earthly avatar. Their message: have faith, but for God’s sake, not too much!

On another comedic note, before his death, Pope John Paul II had asked the media not to refer to his vehicle as the ‘Popemobile’, which he felt was a rather derogatory term. Apparently, riding around in a see-through glass dome, looking not unlike a life-size snow glob, is cool, but its nomenclature isn’t. God and Popes are decidedly forbidden to possess a sense of humor.

Suspected terrorists watched too many action movies

As the plot thickens after the arrests of 4 men suspected of trying to blow up fuel tanks at JFK airport, a number of experts have come forward explaining their terrorist plot would not have had the desired effect they were seeking: the complete destruction of JFK Airport. At best, these men could have set off a dangerous blaze, though nothing that would have endangered the lives of JFK’s daily commuters.

If you’re new to the story, here’s the recap: four Trinidadian Muslims, of some advanced age, had begun surveillance work on the airport allegedly in an attempt to ignite and explode the giant fuel tanks, as well as the pipeline. Although this may certainly sound both impressive and frightening, according to most experts, producing anything more than a fire would have been next to impossible.

I can’t say I’m entirely surprised, considering the fact that many of the suspected terrorists had lived for quite a few decades in America. How else could they possibly think a simple fire or a small explosion could create the necessary chain reaction to destroy an entire airport? It’s conceivable that the plot had been devised while watching Die Hard 2, or some equally far-fetched action movie (although in this instance, they would probably have rooted for the bad guys). One has to wonder why, out of the many different violent fantasies they undoubtedly had, they picked that one. Presumably, they wanted a big show.

This act is yet another example of the murderous impulse of faith; it is no coincidence these men were counting on the righteous hand of God to punish those they considered to be infidels. So willing were they to accept this fantasy that they felt the arrival of a 5th member (in actuality an informant) was an act of God. It never occurred to them that their actions were wrong, evil, and disgusting. To them, there was no greater show of piety than the destruction of innocent human lives.

I’m glad none of these men took the time to read a physics book, or even just watch a few documentaries instead of the show 24. Religious fundamentalists are incapable of duplicating the refined works of science; instead, their violent sectarian minds can only use these tools as a blunt instrument of destruction. In this case, they engineered a terrorist plot out of the contrived writings of B-movie scripts. It then only seems fitting that the ‘good guys’ stopped them in time; one good cliché always deserves another.

Iran encourages temporary marriage licenses

For most Orthodox religions, sex is tricky business. They struggle so hard to suppress it, especially outside the confines of marriage, it’s a miracle that most of these people actually manage to reproduce. But each particular sect develops their own individual loop holes that allow for a little breathing space. In the case of Islam, ‘temporary’ marriages offer a solution for the lonely and sexually frustrated young Muslim.

Although the practice is still mostly shunned, there is resurgence in its popularity, now that Iran’s Interior Minister Mostafa Pourmohammadi openly encourages it. The move is motivated almost entirely by the growing political pressure coming from the country’s youth, who now make up over 50% of the population. Often too poor to afford houses and expensive dowries, young men under the age of 30 pine for the ability to relieve their sexual urges in a way that does not violate their religious traditions. Critics however argue that the practice is no better than prostitution, since the marriages sometimes last no more than a few hours, with a dowry being paid to the bride as part of the marriage contract.

Personally, I’ve never objected to prostitution; even if I did, it wouldn’t stop people from engaging in the world’s oldest profession. Why it should be illegal for two consenting adults to engage in an activity that is legal when it’s free is beyond me. Still, in this case, it seems to me nothing more than silly religious placating. Do any of these pious young men really think their God is so naïve as to be fooled by the intentions of the groom? One wonders how they reconcile the fact that a loving God, who forbids sex before marriage, would make the young life of any adolescent entirely focused on the idea. Such a tease!

All kidding aside, my concern lies with the poor women involved in these mut’ah, who may not get their fair shake in the transaction. It’s no surprise women are often victims in the unregulated and dangerous world of the sex trade. Would proper protection be used? How would they treated, if they were known to take active parts in these marriages? Would their lives be at risk?

This is but a small example of the conservative elements of Islam trying in vain to adapt to the growing needs of its practitioners. As much of the rest of the world enjoys the ability to engage in pre-marital sex without the danger of being imprisoned or punished, the Muslim religion continues to struggle with how to maintain its orthodox values amidst other competing ideologies. In the case of mut’ah, critics who insist the practice is nothing more than glorified prostitution are not wrong in their analysis. Although it may benefit young couples who want to experiment with sex, it will undoubtedly create a dangerous and possibly violent new sexual trade in a country that often considers women to be second class citizens.

Crippled by fear, UK schools strike events from history class

By now, we’ve all heard of cases where religion has tried to insert its alternative, often deleterious, truths into science classrooms and textbooks in the US. If this hasn’t confused students about the facts, it certainly has presented a perplexing message about how to uncover truths. On the side of evolution, we find an appeal to relentless observation and questioning, whereas on the side of creationism, we find an appeal to ignorance (ex: life is so complex, how can we possibly understand its origins without introducing a supernatural cause?). However, this time around, religion is rearing a different, quite divisive head in the UK.

Unlike what is transpiring in America, the topic of history is now the latest member of the list of things we can’t talk about civilly due to a dire need to appease all religions at onceAccording to Daily Mail, a recent government report uncovered a group of high-school teachers who instituted a self imposed ban on classroom discussions of the Holocaust of WWII, and the Crusades of the 11th Century. The decision was motivated out of fear that certain Muslim students would continue to, or begin expressing strong anti-Semitic views, potentially offending other students. These two topics were expressly omitted because they ‘would have challenged what was taught in some local mosques,’ said the report.

It’s never a surprise when religion interprets history in a way that portrays its faithful in a more favorable light than non-followers. Some would call it a perk for joining the club. But should a religious interpretation of events really override a secular discussion of the facts in a public classroom? For a school to stand down, sweeping these truly world-shaping events under the carpet, it does everyone an enormous disservice. Not only will these teens be more likely to harbor aggressive world views into adulthood, never quite working out their differences during their formative years, but being taught by a teacher who was afraid to share these important lessons will likely doom them, and perhaps many of us, to repeat history.