A fan – who shall remain anonymous for reasons that will be clear in the email – sent me a letter I thought I would share with the rest of you. I’m not the best at giving advice to people in awkward situation like his, but since this is an atheism site, readers are bound to have opinions that they’re only too happy to share.

Hi Jake,

How do I ask my boss for Friday off to attend the Texas Freethought Convention?

The financially-fit, skilled, and competent version of me that I strive to be would be honest. Regretfully, I am not that man, and honesty is not really an option here.

I just started an internship at the end of August following a long stretch of unemployment. As an intern, I am extremely dependent on both my boss and my coworkers to learn on the job.

Even though I’ve only been with the company for a few weeks, I’ve found that my co-workers are vocal about their lives outside of work. Through this I’ve gathered that the three people in my immediate group are Christians. One of them even expressed frustration with being set up on a blind date with an, “atheist.”

A couple of years ago, my Christian parents found out that I had discarded the belief in god that I was raised with. Aside from their initial negative reaction, my lack of belief has not been discussed. They are still expressive of their beliefs around me while I keep my outlook to myself. My immediate family and friends of the family are also un-aware of my lack of belief. I remain silent partially due to respect, but largely due to my poor financial state.

The complicating link between my family and my work is my father; he has been with this particular company for all of his life.

I need my both parents and this internship to survive. I don’t feel comfortable risking either direct or indirect recourse with my co-workers or my parents. I am – for lack of a better word – scared.

The most appealing solution I can discern is to say that I am attending a Leadership Conference. If my co-workers accept this at face value and don’t prod any deeper, then I might be okay, but I wouldn’t know how to answer the, “who is hosting it,” or the, “where is it at,” follow-up questions.

Do you have any suggestions?

Well, I’m not a big fan of lying, but I don’t see you having a lot of choice. It sounds like drawing attention to yourself isn’t a good idea. My long-term suggestion would be to find a way not to have your balls in that kind of vice. Maybe that means moving somewhere else, where you don’t have to hide your beliefs for the sake of your job. I don’t know your family situation (which is what makes this part almost impossible), but living in such a hostile environment to unbelief for the rest of your life doesn’t seem desirable in the slightest.

Your story makes me wonder if there shouldn’t be an “covert” option available for people wanting to attend atheist conventions where the event builds a fake site for people with bosses and colleagues that just wouldn’t “get it”. It’s true that makes us non-believers appear dishonest or “closeted” about our beliefs, but we can’t expect everyone to risk losing their jobs, their friends, or even their family to show up at one of these events. It would be a little like the site “Ashley Madison” which bills your credit card under a pseudonym to ensure your spouse is unaware of your actions. It’s sad that such a service seems necessary, but that’s just the way things have to go until religious people stop having a “problem” with our existence.

I love getting these kinds of letters:

Jacob,

Just wanted to drop a quick line to share an encounter I just had with a Jehovah’s Witness while walking my dog. She stopped to ask me about my religious views and I told her I was an atheist. Then she asked if I believed in evolution and I said “Of course, but I don’t have to believe in it, it’s a scientific fact.” She replied with “Well, it’s only a theory.” Of course I had to explain to her what the word theory meant and bring up the example gravity, etc. Then she tried to go into the intelligent design stuff. I won’t bore you with the details, but I was calm and genial with her and at the end she kept trying to excuse herself as I was answering her points and bringing up new ones. After five minutes she literally had nothing else to say other than there was a ‘publication’ about creation vs. evolution that I should read. So sad, these people. I know I won’t convert someone like that but it was satisfying for her to realize there are people who aren’t gullible idiots who can trump her mythology with reason every time. Love the show. Keep up the good fight!

You really can’t “convert” anyone over night. It’s a slow process, but trust me when I say it’s experiences like this that chip away at the certainty people have in regards to their faith. The more we challenge these bozos, the better. You keep up the good work, Joel!

I received an email from a fan, and I thought his question was too important for me to answer on my own. I thought I would put it up to have the rest of the community on TGA give their own advice as well:

My mother is a big church lady and heavy devout Christian, her inner ties with high church officials have given her connections in many places all over town. If you live in this area, chances are you know my mother.

Now I know you don’t like preface to questions, but this is important. I am a vocal performer, and it is important to note that classical vocal pieces (songs) and such have heavy religious ties due to the influence of the church during the Renaissance, now to pursue my studies in music I have performed with several church groups and hundreds of religious songs for concert performance and education. I am planning on going to community college as a vocal performance major.

A friend of my mother’s, a pastor at a local church, offered to have the church pay for one half of my college tuition, if I go to this one religious university.

Here is the question. (if you skipped the last paragraph, at least read the line above)
Should I take the money and go to this school, or deny the church’s money and go to a secular college at full cost to me?

I’m probably the wrong person to ask about college advice, since I didn’t go myself. With that said, you’re in a tough spot I’m sure many others have been in. You have a chance to go to school without having to pay a large portion of it. Student debt has reached about 1 trillion dollars (it surpassed credit card debt recently), and it’s quickly becoming clear that personal debt is a new form of economic slavery. To do anything worthwhile, you often have to enter into a vicious cycle of debt, and I can appreciate people’s effort to avoid this vicious trap.

According to a College Board report issued last fall, median earnings of bachelor’s degree recipients working full time year-round in 2008 were $55,700, or $21,900 more than the median earnings of high school graduates. And their unemployment rate was far lower.

Indeed, some economists worry that all the news about unemployed 20-somethings mired in $100,000 of college debt might discourage some young people from attending college.

With that said, you might find compromising your school choice for purely financial reasons might make you unhappy and miserable. I don’t know what this religious school is like, but my guess is that you’ll find yourself meeting too few like minded peers, an important part of not only your college experience, but also a chance for you to make new friends that will influence you for a long time to come. A person’s environment has a huge impact on their wellbeing, their happiness, and their general life satisfaction, so never forget that.

I haven’t really given you an answer, but my guess is that there’s still a lot more research on your part that must be done before you make up your own mind. There is so much about your situation that is unknown to me, and as a result, any advice I give would be grossly incomplete, and probably bad. So what does everyone else think of his dilemma?

A fan of the show sent me this letter:

I recently observed a “lunch-table” debate regarding religion, which I thought had a slightly different twist on morals. The debate quickly heated between a Muslim woman and a Christian man over why hard alcohol cannot be purchased on Sundays. The Muslim women, seeming a lot more level-headed, asked how this was not an affront to the separation of church and state. This was followed by several back-and-forth comments, but one of the comments made by the Christian man really intrigued me and I thought I would see what you thought. In defense of this absurd law, he said that all politicians bring in their own morals that are based on their own world views. He continued that whether you are an atheist, Muslim, Christian, Buddhist, or anything else, that you have certain beliefs that make up your worldview. Thus, because these individuals are being elected, means that people want them to govern with their world view. It isn’t about separation of church and state to him because he views it as just another alternative background for moral teaching. I think he was trying to separate laws that are specifically indicative of the religion, like posting the 10 commandments at public buildings, or prayer in school, and those that are more disguised like, no alcohol on Sundays, no gay marriage, no abortions, etc. Not wanting to inject myself into a conversation with several colleagues, I sat back and listened.

Do you have any insights on how to address the Christian man’s assertions, or how to address the moral authority of the religious in general, specifically in a quick, succinct argument?

First of all, I have to fundamentally disagree with the Christian man’s opinion. In most countries, politicians are usually elected because they belong to a specific party, or because their political platform appeals to voters. It’s mostly in America that you find “value voters”, and these are merely religious folks masking their theological ambitions. The rest of us take a much more pragmatic view of politics.

Once they are elected, politicians have a duty to serve the interests of all their electorate, not just the people that voted them in office. Politics is about compromise; the ability to get the best results for the most people. Ideologues are the dangerous ones. The already fragile gears of bureaucracy can quickly come to a grinding halt if people refuse to play ball because of their “convictions”. That’s why your government has effectively stopped functioning. Rather than try and reach a consensus, the portion of American politicians who were voted in based on their “values” continue to undermine the system trying to square off their beliefs with the way politics works. As a way of leading, it’s an unmitigated failure.

If you’re engaged in an argument about religion “as an integral part of morality”, you’ll simply get caught in a different discussion altogether. It’s obvious to anyone with half a brain and a proper education in history that religion has NOTHING to do with morality. If it did, witch burnings, genocides, pogroms, infanticides et al would never have been a problem at all. How many religions can claim to have no blood on their hands? Why have they failed to provide the answer to such a simple question?

The simple fact is the separation of church and state is the only way that our society can work for the good of more than the people in charge. What is their alternative to secularism? How would they feel if a religious minority dissimilar to them was suddenly in power? I bet you they would be much less excited about their “moral views” then…

A fan of the site sent me this depressing letter, and it’s just another example of the difficulty we have fighting stupidity in today’s society:

Hi Jake,
Your stuff is always entertaining. This is connected with your latest tirade (and well-justified, I might add!) about so-called psychics. I have been trying to get something done about them here in the UK but am having little success. I did get an ad. feature pulled from our local paper for this guy*, who was making blatant claims about his service that could not possibly be substantiated, but the main man I am trying to put out of business is here*, if you can stand the excessive use of Flash! His website is good for a laugh, if nothing else!

See “shop for goodies”. I have reported him to our ASA. (Advertising Standards Authority) now they can investigate web ads, with a view to stopping him selling his so-called “healing cream” and other items (see also “quartz stone”) with his preposterous claims about them, but they came back with:

“Thank you for your recent complaint about claims made by Quintin Smith on his website. I understand you challenge whether they can be substantiated. We have assessed the specific claims you highlighted but have concluded that there is insufficient grounds for ASA intervention on this occasion. Whilst we appreciate your views and acknowledge that many people will be skeptical about services of this kind, the claims you mentioned seem to convey the marketer’s own opinion and are unlikely to be mislead consumers to their detriment. We do not consider that they require objective substantiation and do not propose to investigate your complaint further on this occasion. I realize that this outcome will disappoint you, but thank you for taking the time to contact us with your views.”.

Total whitewash, in my opinion. It seems to me that he’s making quite clear, nonsensical statements about the products that can’t possibly hold water. Also tried our medicines regulatory authority. (After all, what IS the stuff? No provenance quoted. Could be anything). Answer: “We would expect these products to be regulated by the Trading Standards Services” Had a go at them, but an auto reply and nothing further. Seems I’m banging my head against a brick wall here!

Man, I feel like we’re fighting this war on idiocy with blanks! We can’t even get a bunch of scammers to stop selling their dangerous products to the public. How can we ever hope to win this thing?

*(Update: Both sites are thankfully no longer active)

I received a number of emails about the Harris vs Craig debate, and I thought it would be fun if we had a forum to discuss a question that’s been on my mind since listening to the debate: does objective morality exists?

We’ll start with one of the letters I got from a fan of the show:

Hi there TGA,
I just thought I’d say that I really enjoyed the debate you posted between Sam Harris and Something Craig. However, as an atheist I was surprised to find that I was disappointed by Sam’s showing. It seemed to me that he spent most of his time rehashing arguments he’d made at previous talks rather than addressing the statements made by Professor Craig. Specifically, I felt that the Prof adopted an almost pantheist or deist framework, refusing to acknowledge the sectarian beliefs we all know he holds, while Sam spent the debate firing heavy artillery at those very sectarian contentions, thereby missing Craig’s assertions entirely.

There are a lot of flaws in Craig’s argument that weren’t discussed and it’d go along way in satisfying my urge to shake some sense into him, in a way Sam didn’t, if you’d address them in your next podcast.

Before I talk about this on the podcast, I think it’s important for me to say that I’m not entirely convinced there is such a thing as “objective morality” in the Universe. That’s not to say I don’t believe in right or wrong; I’m just not convinced there’s any empirical evidence to suggest human morality is somewhat built on the premise certain actions are Universally wrong and Universally right outside our own species.

So I’m presented with a bit of a dilemma: while I think Craig’s argument – this objective morality is grounded in the concept of a morally perfect God – fails to address a number of issues, Sam similarly fails in my view to demonstrate how an objective morality exists outside of our own framework.

Still, I haven’t yet read his book, and his argument may be simply incomplete. So while I try and spend the next few days securing and analyzing his tome, I want your opinions on whether you think objective morality in fact exists!

I got this email from Joel who has been listening for a while and felt “inspired” by some of my “be a dick” rants.

Jake,

I’ve been a loyal listener for a few months now and I’m proud to say I seized a perfect opportunity to “be a dick” today. As I was boarding my subway, headed home from an afternoon in Manhattan, I saw three guys in suits carrying Bibles and pictures of a crucified Jesus. I thought, “here we go.” As soon as the doors shut, the tallest guy started talking and I interrupted him, shouting above him to take his religion away from a public space so we didn’t have to listen to them. This was met with approving glances from other commuters. One of the guys launched into the “the human eye is so complex that it must have been made by God” spiel, which I also rebutted, informing them they knew nothing about evolution. One of them jeered and said “we didn’t come from any monkeys,” to which I responded, “evolution doesn’t say we come from from monkeys, which further proves you don’t know the first thing about it.” These types of exchanges continued. I trotted out all sorts of evil from the Old Testament and the guy to whom I was directly talking said “Oh, that’s the Old Testament, you’re supposed to pay attention to the New Testament. That I forced him to utter that phrase aloud and admit that their brand of christianity picked and chose what to espouse was one of my most satisfying moments of the interaction. Yes, I was loud, yes I peppered my speech with the occasional expletive and even said something about being an intelligent gay atheist. But it was oh so satisfying. As soon as they got off at their stop, more than one person thanked me and said “Thanks, you said what all of us were thinking.” The subway car then returned to peace and quiet and I went back to reading my book.

Thinking about your “be a dick” rants helped inspire me to say something, and once that cork had popped there was no stopping it! Thanks again for the show, the interviews, etc. I’ve enjoyed the free bonus shows this month. it might be time for me to finally subscribe!

Do I love the fact people out there are kicking ass because of something I said? Does a bear shit in the woods?

I received this email just a few days ago from a guy named Andy, and I thought you guys would get a kick out of it:

Hello Jake I know you must get some real harsh mail concerning your fate when you die and as a follow of Christ I want to apologize for that, I want to applaud you in your decision making for at least you have given it some thought and have come to conclusion, but what I do not understand is this, why do you spend so much time talking about a God you do not believe in, if I were you and did not believe there was a God there is so much more to do than waste my time on something that does not have any meaning. But the problem is Jake you have had your encounter with the I AM and have feel that He has let you down over the death of a love one and instead of trying to find the answer why you have chosen to go to war with him, spend some serious time again Jake just listen again to what he has to say, you may be surprised at the outcome. Well I do want to send you blessings to you and your family in the name of Christ.

This is why you should never just “trust” every dumb feeling that you have Andy; I haven’t lost any loved ones, and my atheism has really nothing to do with any feelings of bitterness towards your anthropomorphic God. Perhaps you fail to understand when I make fun of “Him”, I’m not actually acknowledging the fact a God exists. If I spent my time trying to disprove the existence of demonic space Unicorns, would you also accuse me of believing in the very thing I seek to expose as mere fantasy? As for your statement I should stop wasting my time since “He” doesn’t exist, I seriously wish it were that easy, but even your barely comprehensible email is proof religion facilitates ignorance. Do you have any serious proof a 2000 year old Jew was the creator of the Universe outside your barbaric and outdated book of Bronze Age mythology?