Remember Mother Teresa? You may recall often today, every time someone fails to commit an act of selfishness, they are automatically criticized for not being like her. This woman is still revered by many as a symbol of goodness and generosity. Unfortunately, it would seem her saintliness was not a result of her religious conviction. It seems to have been only a facade, as recently published letters indicate for years, Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu had completely lost her faith.

This stunning revelation is made all the more confusing by the fact its publisher, Rev. Brian Kolodiejchuk, released the letters in order to bolster Mother Teresa’s chances at sainthood. Why? Well, according to this obviously confused preacher man, it supposedly demonstrates her tortured nature, and difficulty in accepting what can only be described by this humble writer as reality. Here are a few choice quotes from her:

“Where is my faith? Even deep down, there is nothing but emptiness and darkness… If there be God” please forgive me!

Such deep longing for God: Repulsed, empty, no faith, no love, no zeal

What do I labor for? If there be no God, there can be no soul. If there be no soul then, Jesus, You also are not true.”

She had asked that the letters be destroyed after her death, to cover up the reality that for almost a decade, she had completely lost her faith. The church decided otherwise, for reasons which are still quite baffling.

It’s a strange reminder that those who shroud themselves in the veils of saintliness often do so to cover up some gigantic character flaw. Obviously, I’m not saying her faithlessness was such a flaw; on the contrary, it was a woman admitting to herself there simply was no real evidence for her belief. Still, you have to wonder how many other high profile religious folks are simply closet atheists, hiding secret diaries that would otherwise expose their inability to admit to themselves and the world they have stopped believing in fairy tales.