It looks like science is finally pushing back hard against the pseudoscience that is homeopathy. The British Medical Association has come out publicly and stated it’s nothing more than “witchcraft”, and the National Health Service should cease to fund this quackery.

Homeopathy is witchcraft. It is a disgrace that nestling between the National Hospital for Neurology and Great Ormond Street [in London] there is a National Hospital for Homeopathy which is paid for by the NHS”.

Already strapped for cash, the NHS is looking for ways to trim the fat, and there’s no bigger dead weight than the ineffectual vials of water that pass as medicine. Of course, there’s always some idiot trying to argue even if homeopathy is no different than a placebo, the mental health of patients is vastly improved by its consumption. This, homeopaths argue, somehow justifies the public paying for it, even when no measurable effect has ever been demonstrated.

Homeopathy helps thousands of people who are not helped by conventional care. We don’t want it to be a substitute for mainstream care, but when people are thinking about making cuts to funding, I think they need to consider public satisfaction, and see that homeopathy has a place in medicine

“Public satisfaction” is not the way you measure the relative success of medical treatment. It either works or it doesn’t, and if it doesn’t, it has no business calling itself “medicine” in the first place. I’m sick and tired of the argument because helpless morons feel better after consuming sugar pills, that somehow “alternative medicine” is just as effective as conventional treatments (did I mention how ridiculously expensive nonsense can be?).

If you want to call yourself “medicine”, you have to pass the rigors of the scientific method, and since homeopathy has utterly failed every single attempt to show a demonstrable effect, it should be tossed aside like so many of its quack predecessors, like phrenology, iridology, and crystal healing. Would any other of these failed treatments be considered effective if people claimed it helped them?

Could it be? Could Canadian pharmacists finally start cluing in that selling unlicensed health remedies is a terrible fucking idea? The National Association of Pharmacy Regulatory Authorities (their cryptic acronym is NARPA) have taken a stance against so-called natural health remedies, saying unless they can obtain a license from the government, pharmacists should avoid selling them.

Finally a bit of common sense, although it doesn’t go far enough in my opinion (since you could license any product so long as it’s found to do no harm). Natural remedies fall into two categories; either they sell products that do absolutely nothing (like homeopathic solutions), or they contain active ingredients who’s concentration and potency are often improperly measured (presumably because these guys aren’t exactly expert scientists). Any medicine that can potentially heal can also potentially harm you. Luckily, since most of these remedies don’t do jack shit, they’ve never had to worry about regulation. Basically, the whole “industry” is less regulated than international waters.

I love how in this article, the main defense against this hard stance is people will lose their jobs.

“We are talking about job loss, we are talking about a lot of income loss, we are talking about product stuck in warehouses that cannot be sold,” Jean-Yves Dionne, a spokesman for the Canadian Health Food Association, said in an interview.

The industry is worth about 2 billion dollars a year, but considering the vast majority of them sell solutions of diluted water or wax, it’s no great loss these scammers will be out of work. Perhaps they should take the opportunity to go to school and learn a trade actually useful to society.

It never ceases to amaze me how utterly incapable some people are of admitting defeat. A few days ago, we recorded a bonus show reporting a group of skeptics in Britain had staged a “mass suicide” at one of the largest pharmacy chains in the country. They consumed entire bottles of homeopathic “medicine” to demonstrate they are no better than placebos, arguing that Boots has no business selling what is essentially water as real medicine. Recently the American Association of Naturopathic Physicians responded by posting this up, and it’s worth a read if you want to have a good laugh:

Do these “skeptics” really think the public cares about Avogadro’s number [referring to the limit of how much substance is present in diluted form] when homeopathy has just significantly improved their toddler’s autism or offered help with any of a vast range of diseases which respond so well to homeopathic (and often not to conventional) treatment?

This is just another tantrum by the clueless wing of the scientific/medical community that can’t understand why the people don’t praise them for their ideological purity and courage, even when the fruits of their scientific labors rot like a brown banana. Note to protestors: maybe they’re just not that into you.

In other words, skeptics are big meanies who like to try and use science to ruin everyone’s good time. Don’t they know that people ignorant of the scientific method have continued to enjoy their products and attributed their body’s natural healing process to solutions that contain no trace amount of medicine at all? Who cares about intellectual integrity when you have “good feelings”?

I’ve made no bones about my general disdain for the self-help industry. Like religion, this insidious New Age garbage is populated almost entirely by swindlers preying on people desperate for change and meaning in their lives. Charismatic individuals with silver tongues and easy answers make millions of dollars preying on the weak and offer very little in return.

Perhaps my least favorite of these clowns is James Ray, who managed to catapult himself to stardom after appearing in the movie “The Secret“. If you don’t remember this steaming pile of crap, its basic assertion is that a universal force called “The Law of Attraction” allows thoughts to manifest themselves into reality. In other words, just think positively, and the Universe will give you what you desire; kind of like a Cosmic genie (this is what the movie actually endorses). Of course, the flip side to this ridiculousness is if bad things are happening to you, you’re the one who invited it on yourself. Ray and his ilk try and use quantum mechanics to back up their claims, but like Richard Feynman wisely stated “if you think you understand quantum mechanics, you don’t understand quantum mechanics”.

Ray has gotten in trouble a few times with his bullshit self-help techniques, but the events of October 8th, 2009 are sure to haunt him for a long time. You see, during one of his Sedona, Arizona sweat-lodge retreats (Sedona is the capital of the New Age movement it seems), three people died in his poorly build lodge, and another 18 had to be treated for burns, severe dehydration and kidney failure. Ray was untrained in this ancient Native American tradition, and he had no medical staff on hand to take care of any potential problems. He also had forced all the lodgers to fast for 36 hours before the ordeal, and even while people were passing out and vomiting, he was still telling people to stay in the sweat lodge. The results were dozens injured, and three dead.

Before his arrest today, James had tried all kinds of asinine things to remove any culpability, including hiring a medium to tell the family of the victims their deceased loved ones were busy enjoying the afterlife. Needless to say, no one was very amused. Now he gets to see if his famous Law of Attraction he so loves can help him escape the confines of jail. I sure hope you’re not having any thoughts about being raped in the shower, buddy…

Remember the controversy surrounding Andrew Wakefield and his Lancet article that tried to make a link between autism and the MMR vaccine? If you don’t, the basic 30 second version goes something like this:

In 1998 Wakefield writes publishes a paper suggesting a link between autism and gastrointestinal disease with the MMR vaccine, and asks the government to stop distributing the vaccine until more study is done

In 2004, the Sunday Times reports that most of the parents of the children used in the study were recruited by a lawyer to file a lawsuit against the MMR vaccine manufacturers, and that Wakefield himself had been paid by this same lawyer to conduct the study

It was also discovered that data was falsified to prove that the symptoms had all occurred after the shot, even though many of the children showed the symptoms before actually getting vaccinated.

Flash forward to today, where the General Medical Council ruled Wakefield acted both dishonestly and irresponsibly, and had failed in his duties as a consultant. Now the Lancet has also removed his article from the archives, effectively closing an embarrassing chapter in their otherwise illustrious history.

There you have it. There really are no arguments left. The only piece of evidence “anti-vaxers” have has just been definitively proven to be a fraud, and Wakefield is disgraced. All that’s left is for the GMC to take disciplinary actions against him. Obviously, we all know this won’t do anything to stop the anti-vaccination movement, which is hell bent on proving a connection exists. They don’t need anything inconvenient like evidence to back up their claims; as far as they are concerned, they’ve already made up their minds.

It’s sad when people refuse to accept the truth, but in a way, I feel a bit of sympathy for these idiots. They want someone to blame for the fact their children are developmentally disabled, and the MMR vaccine was an easy scapegoat. It can’t be easy trying to raise a child with a disability, but it doesn’t entitle you to make shit up, and put other children at risk because you can’t accept reality. Because of their efforts, previously contained diseases like measles and rubella are back with a vengeance, and for the first time in decades people are dying from these highly preventable diseases. I personally feel embarrassed we can’t stop these morons from spreading their misinformation, even when their own studies are disgraced. When are people going to learn?

If you’re not a regular visitor to randi.org (that’s famous skeptic James Randi’s website), you might not know about their fight against dangerous quackery; more specifically, their attempts to expose bogus “bomb detectors” that are nothing more than dowsing devices. The device in question, called the ADE-651, has no electronic components to speak of and has a rather unimpressive looking antenna on it. This didn’t stop the Iraqi military from dishing out a massive $85m dollars on the piece of junk. If you’re wondering how they could spend such an exorbitant amount of cash on a handle with a TV antenna on it, it’s because each device costs about $40,000.

I can’t imagine how many people have died as a result of using this expensive piece of shit. Not only does it fare worse than random chance at detecting anything (the only thing I would venture to say it detects is complete gullibility), it’s based entirely on dowsing “principles”. You might remember dowsers as the old fogies who run around with a stick thinking it leads to water that you used to point at and laugh as a child. Well, laugh no more, as its use has put hundreds and thousands of peoples lives at risk. There’s no telling what kind of damage this thing has done, or how many deaths can literally be attributed to it.

The CEO of ATSC who produces the ADE 651 was recently arrested on suspicion of fraud, but he continues to defend his product, claiming the only reason people don’t like it is it looks crude:

Mr McCormick told The Times that his device was being criticised because of its crude appearance.
He added: “We have been dealing with doubters for ten years. One of the problems we have is that the machine does look a little primitive. We are working on a new model that has flashing lights.”

Is this fucking guy for real? No, we don’t need flashing lights on your piece of junk; we need you to give all the money back, followed immediately by your long incarceration, where I hope you’ll be beaten senseless on an almost daily basis for the terrible pain you’ve inflicted.

The National Post let a quack naturopath write an op-ed, and as you might have guessed, it’s pretty terrible (the article has since been taken down). Here are some highlights:

Many Canadians aren’t aware of how safe, scientific and effective naturopathic medicine is…Naturopathic doctors are likely to undertake additional diagnostic testing to understand what else might be going on, and take the time to talk to patients about lifestyle and environmental factors, all in the interest of identifying the potential underlying causes of a patient’s complaints.

The only reason naturopathy can be considered safe is it literally has no discernible effect. And how exactly do you and your deluded ilk perform your “diagnostic testing”? It’s not revealed in the article, but a simple visit over at the Vancouver Naturopathic Clinic gives us a a glimpse into their methods:

Electrodermal Testing: Electrodermal testing combines Traditional Acupuncture theory and Classical Homeopathic theory. It enables an experienced practitioner to quickly obtain information about many of these stress factors that come from the environment and which are not usually considered in normal medical testing but which can be responsible for many conditions. Unexplainable conditions, conditions in which conventional testing finds nothing wrong, vague or unusual symptoms and failure to respond to treatment. Electrodermal testing is useful in assessing the following:

• Food sensitivities and intolerances
• Environmental insensitivities and intolerances
• Organ weaknesses
• Mineral deficiencies
• Vitamin deficiencies
• Potential harmful reaction from medications

Ok, now you might be wondering what the hell “Electrodermal testing” is (I’m curious about “organ weakness”), since even the site doesn’t go into much detail about it. It’s a device similar to Scientology’s e-meter;  it measures the skin galvanic response (in other words, how conductive it is). They claim these devices can be used to test for allergies, and are more effective than regular skin prick tests (which I presume look less exciting). Man, wouldn’t it be great if someone had done a scientific study to see the efficacy of Electrodermal testing…oh wait, someone already has!

Results: …The results of the electrodermal tests did not correlate with those of the skin prick tests. Electrodermal testing could not distinguish between atopic and non-atopic participants. No operator of the Vegatest device was better than any other, and no single participant’s atopic status was consistently correctly diagnosed.

Conclusion: Electrodermal testing cannot be used to diagnose environmental allergies.

See, this is the essential problem with bullshit treatments; the people practicing them are convinced they are effective, despite the best scientific evidence that shows quite clearly they aren’t. This is precisely why they are  likened to magic or other superstitious nonsense. If their diagnostic tools fail to detect something as basic as an allergy (which is quite easy for real doctors to test), then what the fuck is the point?

You might recall that these are the same douchebags who undermine current accepted medical treatments. Naturopaths are against vaccination, and this is no joke folks; in many countries around the world, previously eradicated diseases like the measles are back with a vengeance because of consorted efforts of snake oil salesmen to question the validity of vaccines while simultaneously espousing their nonsense. What guys like Scott Maniquet don’t understand is we’re sick and tired of their stupid bullshit, and we aren’t afraid to get in their faces. Fuck your bullshit therapy, and fuck you for trying to pass your quackery off as real medicine. When you’re sick and tired of being a living joke, you’re more than welcome to come to the grown-up table where we use the scientific method to treat illness rather than magic.

By the way, if you still don’t think there’s any harm in this shit, check out this guy’s site.

Our love affair with alternative “medicines” still demonstrates that as a species, we still have a lot of growing up to do. The persistence of reiki, acupuncture, crystals, homeopathy, and just about every other bullshit “medicine” is due mainly to the mysterious placebo effect, which seems to suggest our bodies respond positively to treatments, even when they do nothing at all.

I think we can easily dissect this phenomenon if we accept human beings are social animals who require just as much comforting as real medicine. A person who visits a homeopath is often given a great deal of time and attention, much more than they would going to the doctors. This simple act alone has a profound effect on the health of the “patient”, and it’s what makes fighting this flim-flam so difficult.

I think it’s sad the gap between medicine and well being is being filled with nonsense. I would be lying if I claimed it didn’t at least help some people heal faster, but I also can’t forget about all the people who have died because they chose alternative medicines rather than the real thing. I’ve often been asked “is it ok to believe in a lie if it’s comforting, or is it always better to tell the truth?”. On an individual level it’s hard to argue that the truth is better, but that’s only if you discount the external effect of one’s belief. Think about all the people who have died because they refused to listen to the truth about their diseases (Andy Kaufman, why did you fall for such a simple scam as psychic surgery?). Do you really believe that ignorance is a virtue, people?

We take modern medicine for granted. It’s something we hardly ever need to think about. The odds of dying of the flu are small; you’re about as likely to die from that as from accidental electrocution. But it wasn’t always this way. Just a few generations ago, before we had the ability to develop vaccines or antibiotics, infant mortality rates were frighteningly high. Children suffering from diabetes would slowly fade to nothingness, their tiny bodies literally starved to death.

The times, though, they have changed. When children are properly immunized, their odds of dying from what were once deadly diseases have dramatically been reduced, so much so that we have begun to underestimate their dangers. Worst still, a small but vocal group is working diligently to actively discourage parents from giving their children vaccines under the mistaken belief they cause autism.

Leading this unthinking and uncritical mob is former Playboy model Jenny McCarthy. Her child is autistic, and like many who believe there is a connection between the MMR vaccine and the neurological disorder, she made the inference simply from her own observation. Because the ideal time to vaccinate (roughly 13 months of age) coincidentally corresponds to the time when symptoms of the disease, a large number of individuals incorrectly assume the two are linked. Their fears and mistrust of medicine actually make them believe the idea the scientific community is purposefully suppressing information linking the vaccine with autism. The truth is no correlation has ever been found.

Take, for instance, this passionate letter author Roald Dahl issued in 1986 (re-issued last month) begging parents to immunize their children. He lost his daughter in 1962 to measles. At the time, there was no vaccine for the disease. Now it’s as easy as making an appointment with your family doctor.

Unsurprisingly, the unthinking masses have been reluctant to vaccinate their children, and as a result, this disease has been on a comeback in Britain. In 2005, there were 76 cases, and 2006 saw an increase to 100. These pale in comparison to this year so far; in Wales alone, the NHS reported the total number of cases so far is 277. A disease that once appeared beaten and downtrodden has come back with a vengeance. The problem lies in the fact that although parents may think it is their choice alone not to immunize their kids, the result is their lack of immunity puts everyone at greater risk.

When Dahl wrote his essay in 1986, 20 kids were dying every year from a highly preventable disease. It looks like the risks have just gotten higher for everyone else thanks to the tireless work of intellectual midgets like Jenny McCarthy and her pet, Jim Carrey. Can you morons all go back to making movies and leaving the job of educating people about health to the professionals? What is it about acting that makes you believe you know enough to be giving counsel to women about the health of their loved ones: was it a cameo on ER or something which made you think that was a good idea?

If you don’t watch her show or buy her stupid magazine, you might not be aware of the reigning endorsement Oprah is currently giving to her friend, Jenny McCarthy. Jenny used to be hot shit, but then she got preggers and disappeared from the limelight, only to emerge as one of the main anti-vaccination spokespeople. You may recall there are still some unfortunate people who think there is a connection between vaccinations and autism. Only a few weeks ago I tore Jim Carrey a new anus for even trying to pretend he understands the issue. His movies may occasionally be funny, but let’s not forget the painful fact the man is poorly educated.

I could spend all of today writing a scathing letter to Oprah condemning her new endorsement, but luckily this charming and intelligent woman has already done so. I think this letter pretty much sums up how we all feel about her support of bad science (I still remember how much of a big deal she made over The Secret). Here’s a quote from the article:

Surely you must realize that McCarthy is neither a medical professional nor a scientist. And yet she acts as a spokesperson for the anti-vaccination movement, a movement that directly impacts people’s health. Claims that vaccines are unsafe and cause autism have been refuted time after time, but their allure persists in part because of high-profile champions for ignorance like McCarthy. In fact, ten of the thirteen authors of the paper that sparked the modern anti-vaccination movement retracted the explosive conclusions they made due to insufficient evidence. Furthermore, it is now clear that the study’s main author, Andrew Wakefield, falsified data to support these shaky conclusions.

Shaky conclusion? That’s a nice way of saying the guy made a bunch of stupid shit up.